Mental Health and Wellness

What is Mindfulness?

counselinganywhereca@gmail.com (Maggie Lavey) — Tue, 10 Aug 2021 15:52:07 GMT

Practice mindfulness to improve well-being.

Mindfulness encompasses a variety of definitions although most are similar in concepts. Mindfulness is described as an awareness that arises from purposely paying attention in the present free from any judgements. Mindfulness is a state of awareness of ones emotions, thoughts, and sensations when each occurs. A third definition of mindfulness is a nonjudgmental state of awareness of present experiences. Various interpretations exist dependent on the context in which mindfulness is being examined. For example, mindfulness can be examined in improving emotional regulation and as a coping tool for stress management.

Mindfulness is being in the present moment in ones body in a fully conscious state, aware of ones own experiences without judgement or narrative- just being in the moment in the here and now with an acceptance of how things are; being aware of our own thoughts, emotions, sensations without being caught up in them- an outside observer of self with an awareness of the moment. Mindfulness can be used throughout the day when walking, eating, and whenever feeling emotionally “charged” to step back and observe internal experiences. Yoga, meditation, and breathing are a few ways to cultivate mindfulness. Being mindful allows for intentional actions and responses rather than living on autopilot without being aware. The benefits of mindfulness are plentiful, and a regular practice is beneficial for enhancing wellness. Being able to stop and really get into the here and now and out of automatic unconscious living enhances feelings of well-being and an ability to respond more effectively with emotional control. Mindfulness can improve experiences and interpersonal relationships alike. Mindfulness is Intentional Living. Give it a try and see what happens.

How do you define mindfulness? How do you cultivate mindfulness in your daily life?

Why the Pandemic's End Spurs Anxiety

Sun, 09 May 2021 15:17:53 GMT

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Each day in the United States, an average of 3.1 million COVID-19 vaccines are going into people’s arms. According to an April 9 White House briefing, a quarter of the country's adults are now fully vaccinated. The pandemic is not yet over, but vaccination could soon yield a much more normal life, especially for those who have been vaccinated. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, for example, now recommends that fully-vaccinated people can visit with each other indoors and travel without quarantining.

But for many, reopening comes with its own set of anxieties. According to APA's Stress in America polling, around half of people say they feel uneasy about readjusting to in-person interaction post-pandemic.

Ellen Hendriksen, PhD, a clinical psychologist at Boston University's Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders and author of How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety , is an expert at clinical strategies for calming anxiety. She spoke to APA about what's driving post-pandemic anxiety and how psychologists can best help.

What do you think is driving the anxiety many people are feeling about reopening?

Anxiety is driven by uncertainty. There is so much uncertainty right now, from the vaccine roll-out to society reopening to the new normal workplace to the virus and the variants themselves. Every day there is more evidence that vaccines keep us and people around us safe, but there are lingering questions about how long immunity lasts, how susceptible kids are to COVID-19, and when they will get vaccinated.

Nobody alive today has ever emerged from a global pandemic into a digital world and navigated this before. We're making it up as we go along, so of course we're anxious. Here at the Center, we have the longest waitlist in our 25-year history. So many people are emerging from the pandemic feeling exhausted, burned out, anxious, or depressed. Collectively, our resources are low, which makes it harder to navigate the layers of uncertainty.

How can people handle social anxiety and awkwardness around different levels of comfort as places reopen?

The fact that reopening is a moving target makes it difficult to align with other people. You and your bubble might be ready to dine in at a restaurant or get on a plane, but the family next door might have a child who is immunocompromised and is living as they were in January. There are more variables to manage compared with before the pandemic.

Plus, social anxiety is driven by avoidance, and we've all been avoiding social interactions for the better part of a year. The fact that we're all rusty is going to make us feel wobbly as we re-enter.

It's OK to say we don't know how to do this, and it's OK to ask people what they're comfortable with. That normalizes the uncertainty and awkwardness, and it's quite validating to say, “What are we doing?” or “How does this work?” It can help you feel like you are united with the other person against this larger problem, as opposed to negotiating one against the other. This is a strategy borrowed from couples therapy, where it is often highly effective.

How can people feel more comfortable with re-entry?

There's one question I've been getting over and over from people who struggle with social anxiety. They'll say, "I did so much work pre-pandemic to get to the point where I could give a presentation or raise my hand in class." They’re worried they’ll be back at square one when they are again in large groups. But social confidence is like a muscle. If you have done work on your social anxiety in the past, that architecture is still there. It will feel awkward at first, but it will come back faster than the first time around. As for feeling comfortable returning to everyday activities, there are dozens of points of re-entry. There will be a first time on public transportation, a first time in someone's house, a first time taking a rideshare. We'll work our way up to large gatherings.

Just because you feel rusty or nervous doesn't mean you're doing it wrong. It means you're getting back out there. Your brain will recalibrate with experience. We all need love, support, and community. Studies show that the quality of our relationships predict our future health, happiness, and even longevity, so it's worth it to push ourselves a little to get the interaction we all need, even if we are the most introverted of introverts.

What should psychologists keep in mind for helping their clients right now?

Psychologists have a big job ahead of us. It may be hard to balance supporting and pushing our clients simultaneously. It’s important to support each individual’s comfort level and choices, but psychologists also need to notice and address life-limiting avoidance. These are anxious, uncertain times, but there is also a sense of hope and renewal. It is an honor that we as psychologists get to play a leading role.

Article by Stephanie Pappas

from the American Psychological Association (APA)

The Shortest Guide to Dealing with Emotions

Thu, 29 Apr 2021 14:53:05 GMT

People avoid emotions instead of confronting them.

Imagine you are sitting in a car, and you are driving down a lonely highway. Suddenly, in the middle of nowhere, a warning light goes off. Your oil pressure is very low. If you just ignore it and continue your drive, you run the risk of doing serious damage to your engine. You know you can get a tow, but this is going to take a while.

As you are considering your next step, you suddenly remember a trick about how you can short circuit the warning light. This would not change anything about the engine—it would still be starved for oil—but the low-pressure signal would no longer be blinking on your dashboard, and you could ignore it more easily.

Here’s the question: Should you do it?

Unless you are seriously intoxicated (at which point you shouldn’t be driving at all), you won’t hesitate to say “no” to that impulse. Rightly so. Turning off the light will not do anything for you. The light is just the messenger, and not the problem in itself. Instead, you would be better advised to take in the information and deal with the situation.

This is easy and intuitive to understand when it comes to external problems like car maintenance. It’s much more confusing, however, when the problems occur internally. When we are confronted with difficult emotions like anxiety, depression, stress, grief, anger, or loneliness, we are quick to search for the off-button on our emotional dashboard instead of taking in the messages they contain.

Make it stop! Give me the wine and cigarettes. Let me cancel this appointment. Engage me on social media. Show me the movies and video games. Do whatever, but just make it stop!

This is often our first response when difficult emotions show up: We try to mute the signal.

But emotions are not the problem. They are merely messengers. And the messages they carry deserve at least to be heard. They often contain important lessons, and can call us to helpful actions. Often they show us opportunities.

What Emotions Can Signal

Fear might show us that danger is up ahead, and we better prepare ourselves. Loneliness might urge us to prioritize close relationships. Grief might open us up to what is important and meaningful to us, while calling out for social connection and support.

Your dashboard doesn’t need to be covered up. It needs gentle attention. No, the dashboard isn’t everything—you still have a road to see and navigate. When emotions arise, you can ask yourself: “What am I feeling right now?” and “Where can I feel it?” and “What does my emotion ask me to do?” and “What does this suggest I am yearning for?” No one turns their driving over to a dashboard, but questions like these help our emotions play their proper role.

If it were just negative emotions, this “turn off the indicator” move would be bad enough, but we are similarly incompetent when it comes to positive emotions. Imagine noticing on your car’s dashboard that your fuel tank is full. Oh, joy! You want it to stay this way, and so you decide to rewire so that the gauge always remains full.

And people avoid positive emotions too! When we feel joy, we sometimes focus on how we will feel when it goes away, so we try never opening up to joy at all. That would be like the person who just disconnects the fuel gauge altogether so that she will never be disappointed when the fuel runs out because she never allowed herself to notice it was full in the first place.

All of this is self-defeating, and yet it’s exactly what many of us do when we feel happy or sad or anxious or hopeful or depressed or satisfied. We like feeling this way, and never want it to stop, and so we cling onto this pleasant feeling, in the hopes of never losing it. Or we detune so it won’t be noticed when it stops, as if being numb is the definition of happiness. We dislike feeling this way, so we push it away as if feelings are the enemy.

Feelings are not just about like and dislike. They are how our past and present impact us. They help train our ability to notice what is present, based on what we’ve experienced in the past. They’re like dashboard gauges that help us adjust to the challenges of our life journey.

Emotions are temporary. They aren’t meant to be avoided, nor are they meant to be clung to. They are meant to come and go, flowing through you in their own time. They contain important lessons when things are off, and beautiful rewards when things fall into place. Allowing emotions to be there when they occur, to listen closely to their message, to feel them fully with neither clinging nor needless defense, allows them to serve their proper role.

Your emotions are not the problem, so feel fully, embrace the change, move forward, and learn how to drive.

For more on the Author: Steven C. Hayes, Ph.D.

Exactly How the Pandemic Has Affected Our Mental and Physical Health

Tue, 20 Apr 2021 15:21:33 GMT

Author: The Bronfenbrenner Center for Translational Research (BCTR) at Cornell University is focused on using research findings to improve health and well-being of people at all stages of life.

We’re more than one year into the global pandemic that has kept many Americans sequestered in their homes and taking precautions to prevent the spread of COVID-19 when they go out. Not surprisingly, these changes in how and when we interact with others has led to changes in our mental and physical health. Among those changes, emerging data show that many Americans have gained weight, are drinking more alcohol, and are not sleeping well.

A nationally-representative survey of 1,500 Americans conducted this year by the American Psychological Association found that more than 40 percent of Americans gained “more weight than they intended” during the pandemic. The average weight gain was 29 pounds, with 10 percent of participants reporting more than 50 pounds of weight gain. In addition, 18 percent of Americans reported losing more weight than they wanted to; the average amount of weight lost among this cohort was 26 pounds.

In addition to weight changes, more than two-thirds of adults reported sleeping more or less than they wanted to. Nearly a quarter reported drinking more alcohol to cope with the stress of the pandemic. And more than 30 percent reported increased mental health issues since the start of the pandemic.

Parents, essential workers, and minorities have fared worse

The survey also collected information on specific groups of Americans; for example, parents. The data show that parents experienced more mental and physical health problems than others. Nearly half of mothers reported a decline in their mental health since the start of the pandemic, compared to 30 percent of all adults. Nearly half of fathers reported drinking more during the pandemic. Compared to the general population, parents were significantly more likely to have received treatment from a mental health professional and to have been diagnosed with a mental health disorder since the pandemic began.

The pandemic has also taken a heavy toll on essential workers. More than half report relying on “unhealthy habits” to cope with pandemic stress. Such workers were more than twice as likely as adults who are not essential workers to have been diagnosed with a mental health disorder since the coronavirus pandemic emerged.

Finally, racial minorities were more likely than others to report health declines during the pandemic. Both Black and Hispanic adults were more likely to report trouble sleeping and weight gain than white adults. In addition, Black participants expressed more concern about the future and more anxiety about re-adjusting to in-person interactions.

A separate study published in the fall underscores the increase in alcohol consumption among Americans. Researchers surveyed a nationally representative sample of 6,000 Americans to find out how often participants drank alcohol and how much they drank. Researchers found that participants had increased the number of days they consumed alcohol by 14 percent during the pandemic. In addition, women reported a 41 percent increase in heavy drinking — four or more drinks in a short time period — and significantly more adverse consequences related to alcohol consumption.

The take-home message: The global pandemic has taken a significant toll on Americans’ physical and mental health beyond illness related to COVID-19.

About the Author:

The Bronfenbrenner Center for Translational Research (BCTR) at Cornell University is focused on using research findings to improve health and well-being of people at all stages of life.

Visit Cornell University’s Bronfenbrenner Center for Translational Research’s website for more information on our work solving human problems.

Four Realistic Rules for Better Self Care

Wed, 07 Apr 2021 15:55:37 GMT

If you think self-care is all about candles and yoga, think again.

The idea of self-care gets a lot of attention, particularly in fields like health care and human services. Unfortunately, in spite of all the talk, many people still struggle to understand what it means and how to get enough of it. In this post, I’ll share four rules to make sure you are on track to living a self-caring life.

Rule #1: Self-care includes self-talk.

Many people protest when they hear about the idea of self-care because they believe they don’t have time to take a yoga class, don’t have money for a massage, or don’t have the energy to exercise. Although this all may be true, it misses the essential point that self-care is ultimately not about what you might do for an hour or two each week. Self-care is a way you live your life, and this includes how you relate to yourself each and every moment of the day.

Self-talk does a lot to shape our mood, our stress levels, and whether we feel overwhelmed or in control. A busy day could be experienced as anxiety-provoking and burnout-producing, but it could also be seen as a challenge to rise and engage our many strengths in the world. The choice is yours.

We do ourselves a disservice by overlooking this critical component of self-care. In fact, no self-caring behaviors will be effective if you are in the habit of stressing yourself out over and over again in your own mind. You may get a massage, but you’ll be thinking about work the whole time. You may take a yoga class, but you’ll be too busy comparing yourself to others in the room.

So pay attention, and start chipping away at your own unique habits of unhelpful thinking; it is the most important and self-caring thing you can do.

Rule #2: Distraction can be helpful, but only for a while.

When I ask people what they do for self-care, most often they talk about ways they distract themselves from their stressors. Some common examples might be binge-watching television, reading a book, or going to a movie. There is nothing wrong with any of these activities on occasion. When emotions are running high or you are completely exhausted, the effort it might take to engage in more active pursuits or attempt to emotionally process what you are going through may prove to be too much. At such times, using distraction for self-care can be helpful.

Problems can arise if the only self-care activities you engage in are things that allow you to check out, numb out, avoid, distract, or ignore your stressors. If this goes on for too long, you may find that you have a backlog of unprocessed thoughts and feelings that could cause your stress or burnout to worsen instead of improve.

Rule #3: Find ways to emotionally process your experiences.

To balance out your favorite distractions, look for activities that help you process the experiences of your life. Self-care needs to involve time to think your way through your stressors and to feel the emotions that come with them.

For instance, if you are overwhelmed by several deadlines happening at once, no amount of distraction will help you in the long run. Instead, it may be better to engage in an activity that directly addresses your intense stress such as a guided relaxation exercise or a conversation with a colleague. Self-care means paying attention to your emotions and giving care and attention to them. The specific activities that help with emotional processing will vary between individuals but could include journaling, drawing, talking about your stress to a friend or therapist, prayer or spiritual practice, dancing, exercise, listening to music, or having a good cry.

You might engage in reading or even watching television, but instead of distraction, you can seek out content that will address the challenges you are facing. For instance, you might read poetry that touches on the emotions you are working through, or watch inspirational speakers online instead of a distracting romance or crime drama.

When considering self-care activities to fit this category, the most important question to ask yourself is: “Have I accessed my own thoughts and feelings, and do I have a somewhat better perspective, a sense of relief, or emotional release, after doing this activity?” If the answer is yes, then you’ve found something great.

Rule #4: Take care of your physical health.

In the pursuit of self-care, people often think they need to add something new and dramatic to their lives. It can be easy to waste time and money getting massages, signing up for meditation classes, and trying new hobbies hoping to find something that excites us. While all of these things can be part of self-care, don't overlook the simple daily routines that help maintain your physical health.

Since you need to eat, sleep, bathe, and dress routinely anyway, these can be good places to improve your self-care habits. What if you chose food that really nourished you? What if you changed your bedtime, or finally bought that new pillow, to help you sleep better? All of these little things can turn your daily routines into opportunities for self-care.

Engaging in self-care is a way of signaling to ourselves that we matter in our own lives. You do not need a lot of time, money, or exotic new activities to improve your self-care. By starting with your self-talk, taking care of your health, and achieving a better balance of distraction and emotional processing, you will be well on your way to living a truly self-caring life.

For more on the author Katherine King Psy.D. click here

Change Your Self-Talk

Tue, 30 Mar 2021 15:19:22 GMT

Examine your self-talk to be sure it is serving you well!

We all have an inner voice that comments on what we are doing, for better or for worse. Psychologists refer to this inner dialogue as self-talk. You are always going to engage in self-talk, but it doesn’t have to be negative. You can learn to notice it and reprogram it so that it is not negative but rather supportive of the changes in your life that you’re trying to make.

Negative self-talk is very common. Most of our self-talk consists of beliefs programmed into us when we were children. We heard these beliefs so often, or in such emotionally intense situations, that now we believe them and repeat them to ourselves whenever the occasion arises.

But do you really want major decisions about your life made by a 4-year-old or an 8-year-old? That’s what’s happening when we accept negative self-talk as the truth about us and about life. Some of our basic attitudes towards ourselves are rooted in unexamined childhood programming.

Self-talk tells us what to do and how to feel about events and situations. A lot of self-talk feeds us valuable information that serves us well, that helps us succeed and even ensures our survival. For example, “Look both ways before crossing the street” and “Stand up for yourself” are constructive reminders.

But other self-talk undermines us and keeps us from fully experiencing parts of our personality. Your inner voice may be telling you things like this:

I know it won’t work.

It’s just no use.

I never have enough time.

I never know what to say.

Everything I touch turns to bleep.

I wince whenever I hear an adult tell a child something like, “You’re stupid,” or “Academics are just not your strength.” If you want a person to act stupidly, both as a child and as an adult, telling them they’re stupid is a reliable way to program them to do so.

Working on your self-talk is a good way to challenge the idea that there’s some inherent flaw in your personality. If you have deficits, you are not doomed to live with them forever; you can change your programming. When that changes, you may find you have hidden strengths where previously you had problems.

Start paying attention to your self-talk. Write down some of the attitudes expressed during self-talk. Ask yourself, would I say to a friend the things I say to myself? Probably not. As adults, we know that saying negative things is hurtful and destroys friendships. So why do we say such things to ourselves?

Self-Talk and Conflict Resolution

Many of us repeat self-talk phrases that oppose our efforts at conflict resolution. For example, here are some self-talk phrases about conflict that many people accept without thought:

Whenever anybody says anything bad about me, I must correct them by pointing out their personal flaws.

The best defense is a good offense.

There are winners and losers—and I’m going to be a winner.

People who disagree with me are opponents to be overcome.

Once I’ve picked the best option, I need to hang on to it and defend it.

These phrases all describe a win/lose model of conflict resolution, and they all make it harder to reach a mutually acceptable solution to the conflict. If you approach conflict with these attitudes, your relationship will be the loser.

Moving to Positive Self-Talk

So how do we change negative self-talk? Using the computer programming analogy, we need to overwrite the negative programs and replace them with a new program. It sounds easy, but it is hard work.

Here are the basic steps in reprogramming your negative self-talk to positive self-talk:

1. Watch for the self-talk statements about yourself.

The first step is to pay attention to your self-talk and identify anything that is negative. You won’t be able to change your negative self-talk without noticing it.

Some people find it helpful to keep a self-talk log. Carry a small notebook, and every time you notice negative self-talk, write it in the log.

2. Monitor the self-talk of people around you.

Sometimes it is easier to see the impact of negative self-talk by noticing its effect on other people. Obviously, you won’t be able to listen in on their inner self-talk, but people often speak their self-talk out loud: ‘I’m just not good at those sorts of things,” “I haven’t got time to deal with that,” “I’ve always wanted to do that, but I just don’t have what it takes.” How does their self-talk limit them? Do they stop doing things they should or want to do? Do they avoid new behaviors that might be helpful or just plain fun?

3. Identify negative self-talk that you want to change.

Next, identify those areas you want to work on. A lot of self-talk is useful. What kinds of self-talk are giving you a problem?

Since we’re working on conflict resolution between loved ones, here are some of the issues and skills you might be thinking about:

Accepting that the other person has a different emotional reality

Listening until you understand the other person—and they feel understood

Learning to express feelings rather than judgments

Avoiding seeing the other person as an adversary

Learning not to personalize everything that is said about a situation—being less defensive

Believing that there are many possible solutions, not just the one you thought of

If you have negative self-talk that makes it hard to make these changes, those phrases might be a place to start your work to reduce negative self-talk.

4. Eliminate internal negative chatter.

Once you’ve learned to notice your negative self-talk, you can work on actively resisting it when it occurs.

Here are a couple of things that can help eliminate negative self-talk:

Some people wear a rubber band and snap themselves with it whenever they start to engage in negative self-talk. (I’ve never tried this, but I’m told it works.)

Some people set up an internal signal, such as telling themselves, “Cancel, cancel,” which tells them to stop the negative self-talk.

5. Replace negative self-talk with positive self-talk.

You are always going to engage in self-talk, but it doesn’t have to be negative. The trick is to use it to help you. Change your self-talk so that you program yourself with the behaviors and attitudes that help.

Look for phrases that really resonate with you, things you really feel. Here are some phrases that you could use:

I trust that [person] loves me.

We have worked things out before and will again this time.

I can control myself and my behavior.

I trust myself to speak up for myself.

I have everything I need to be able to do this.

I can stay right here and remain calm and confident.

I choose not to react and be pulled into what is going on.

I trust I can talk to my partner about this later.

I can ask for help.

I am not alone.

It is okay for me to have whatever feelings I have.

I can choose how I act.

If I trust myself, I can act differently.

I am a good listener. I am attentive, interested, and aware of everything that is going on around me.

I have the courage to share my feelings. I take responsibility for everything I say and do.

Some of these phrases may hit you as overly sweet, while others give you a feeling of hope and real promise. Just ignore the too-sweet ones and pay attention to the ones that give you a charge of energy.

You need to find your own phrases to address the issues you are working on. You need the emotional investment that comes from choosing phrases that have meaning for you. Write your positive self-help phrases in the present tense, as if the desired change has already taken place.

Now try identifying the issues you want to work on, then write down the positive self-help phrases that will help you with these issues.

The essential ingredient in any effort to change negative self-talk is repetition. You’ve been repeating the old self-talk for years, and it will take a while to overwrite this programming. Some people have even reported that it seemed like the old programming tries to talk them out of the new programming. It’s important to select positive self-talk phrases that have meaning and power for you, phrases that you like hearing. Persist!

Here are some of the techniques people use to program positive self-talk phrases:

Mirror, mirror on the wall: First thing in the morning, as you are in the bathroom preparing for your day, repeat your positive self-talk phrases aloud to your image in the mirror. Do this a minimum of 10 times. Say the phrases with energy and enthusiasm.

Sticky notes: One way to remind yourself of your new positive programming is to put sticky notes up in visible places. The note doesn’t have to contain the whole phrase, just enough of a cue to trigger the full phrase in your mind.

Index cards: Some people pit their positive self-talk phrases on 3" × 5˝ index cards. During the day, they take out the cards and read the phrases aloud.

Tape talk: One of the most effective ways to reprogram your self-talk is to play audio recordings of the new phrases. There are professional recordings available, but if you want to use your own personal phrases, you can make your own. Most smartphones can record and play your phrases. People in the field claim that playing these recordings quietly in the background while doing something else is a particularly effective approach.

For more on the Author James Creighton, Ph.D.

Healthy Ways to Handle Life's Stressors

Thu, 18 Mar 2021 15:17:04 GMT

When stress becomes unmanageable, try these evidence-based tools to tackle it in healthy ways

Stressful experiences are a normal part of life, and the stress response is a survival mechanism that primes us to respond to threats. Some stress is positive: Imagine standing in front of a crowd to give a speech and hitting it out of the park. Stressful? Certainly. But also challenging and satisfying.

But when a stressor is negative and can’t be fought off or avoided — such as layoffs at work or a loved one’s medical crisis — or when the experience of stress becomes chronic , our biological responses to stress can impair our physical and mental health.

Fortunately, there are many evidence-based tools to help combat the negative effects of stress in healthy ways. They recommend that you:

Try to eliminate the stressors: Whether or not you experience an intolerable level of psychological stress depends on the intensity of the situation and also the person experiencing it. How you perceive and think about a stressor can also make a big impact on how you respond. It’s not always possible to escape a stressful situation or avoid a problem, but you can try to reduce the stress you are feeling. Evaluate whether you can change the situation that is causing you stress, perhaps by dropping some responsibility, relaxing your standards or asking for help.

Cultivate social support: Strong social support can improve resilience to stress.1 Reach out strategically. Some friends or family members may be good at listening and sympathizing. Others might excel at practical help, like bringing over a home-cooked meal or covering an hour of child care. Giving support can also increase positive emotions and decrease negative emotions.2 Just make sure your relationships stay in balance. A friend who requires support but never gives it may increase your stress level.

Seek good nutrition: When confronted with a stressor, the central nervous system releases adrenaline and cortisol, which affects the digestive tract among other physiological changes. Acute stress can kill the appetite, but the release of the hormone cortisol during chronic stress can cause fat and sugar cravings. Research also suggests that high cortisol combined with high sugar consumption may prompt the deposition of fat around our internal organs3 — visceral fat that is associated with cardiovascular and metabolic diseases. A diet high in a variety of nutrients can both protect health and provide more physical energy to deal with challenges. No need to go vegan or swear off cookies —just aim to consume a rainbow of fruits and vegetables as part of your daily diet. Avoid using substances such as alcohol to dampen the stress response since substances do not solve the root of the problem and can have serious health effects.

R elax your muscles : Because stress causes muscles to tense, being stressed out can create tension headaches, backaches and general fatigue. Combat stress and these symptoms with stretches, massage or warm baths. Or try progressive muscle relaxation, a method that has been shown to reduce anxiety and improve overall mental health.4 To practice progressive muscle relaxation, get in a comfortable position and choose a muscle group, like your lower leg muscles (most practitioners recommend starting with the lower body and working your way up). Inhale and contract the muscles for five to 10 seconds, then exhale and release the muscles suddenly. Relax for 10 or more seconds and then move on to the next muscle group. Another option is passive progressive muscle relaxation. This technique is similar to progressive muscle relaxation but skips the tensing step. Instead, simply picture each muscle group one at a time and focus on relaxing that portion of the body.

Meditate: A strong body of research shows that mindful meditation can reduce psychological stress and anxiety — even short-term mindfulness meditation programs work.5 To get started, set aside five minutes in a quiet place to sit and breathe. Focus on the present moment; if stray thoughts intrude, acknowledge them and then let them go. Don’t judge yourself for any mental wavering. Gently refocus and bring the attention back to the present moment.

Protect your sleep: Daytime stress affects nighttime sleep.6 Making matters worse, losing shuteye can affect both cognition and mood. How to sleep better? Try to have a consistent sleep routine that allows time to wind down before lights out. Meditation and relaxation can help with insomnia.7 Also, avoid caffeine and alcohol in the late afternoon and evening. Put down your screens, as blue light can suppress the sleepy hormone melatonin (and checking social media may ramp up your emotions.) Finally, move your body during the day: A large body of research suggests that physical activity can improve sleep, especially for middle-aged and older adults.8

Get physical: Brisk movement can not only improve sleep, it can directly combat stress. In one study, working adults who participated in moderate physical activity had half the perceived stress as working adults who did not participate.9 Physical activity may also cancel out some of the negative effects of stress, including the impact of stress on the immune system.10 Adding physical activity needn’t be expensive or complex: A brisk 30-minute walk or a dance session in the living room can do the trick.

Take a moment in nature: Studies conducted in multiple countries have found that green space improves mood.11 Even nature videos can speed the recovery from stress compared with videos of urban scenes.12 Taking a moment to notice nature — even in the form of a bustling city park — can refocus and calm your mind.

Keep your pleasurable activities: When life gets overwhelming, people often drop their leisure activities first. But cutting yourself off from pleasure can be counterproductive. Even when time is tight, look for opportunities to do something for yourself, whether that means reading a novel, singing along to your favorite tunes or streaming your favorite comedy on Netflix. Humor and laughter can benefit both mental and physical health.13

Reframe your thinking: One of the most research-supported treatments for stress and anxiety is cognitive behavioral therapy, or CBT. At the root of this therapy approach is the understanding that our thoughts influence our emotions, which in turn influences our behaviors. Reframing your thoughts around a stressor can help manage your emotions, reducing feelings of stress.14 Some tips: If you feel yourself spiraling into imagining worst-case scenarios, stop and put your mind elsewhere. Set realistic expectations for yourself. Strive for acceptance of situations outside of your control.

Seek help : If you feel overwhelmed and self-help isn’t helping, look for a psychologist or other mental health provider who can help you learn how to manage your stress effectively. He or she can help you identify situations or behaviors that contribute to your stress and then develop an action plan to change the stressors, change your environment and change your responses.

Acute Versus Chronic Stress

The experience of stress can be either acute or chronic. Acute stress usually occurs in response to a short-term stressor, like a car accident or an argument with your spouse. Acute stress can be very distressing, but it passes quickly and typically responds well to coping techniques like calming breathing or brisk physical activity.

Chronic stress occurs when stressors don’t let up. The roots of chronic stress can vary widely, from situations people can control or avoid (such as having a toxic friendship) to difficulties that are hard to escape (poverty, racism or other discrimination). Because people respond differently to stressful circumstances, a situation that one person might find tolerable can become a source of chronic stress for another.

Chronic stress can damage both mental and physical health. Being chronically stressed may leave you feeling fatigued, sap your ability to concentrate and cause headaches and digestive difficulties. People prone to irritable bowel syndrome often find that their symptoms spike with psychological stress.15 Though acute stress can heighten certain immune responses, the wear-and-tear of chronic stress is bad for the immune system.16 Chronic stress can also affect cardiac health, with multiple studies finding a link between chronic stress and the development of coronary artery disease.17

Article by The American Psychological Association gratefully acknowledges the assistance of Beverly Thorn, PhD, in developing this fact sheet.

For list of articles References Click here

Carrying a Wound Inner Child Into Your Relationships?

Fri, 12 Mar 2021 16:20:11 GMT

Choosing the best partner by understanding the inner child.

One of the realities of life for many adults is growing up without a happy, stable, loving childhood. Children who do grow up in these environments have a healthy, balanced, and positive inner child full of joy, love, and trust in those around them.

The Emotionally Wounded Inner Child

When children are emotionally and mentally injured, neglected, or even abused in childhood, those inner wounds never heal. The child may act out, including having temper tantrums, facing challenges in making friends, and remaining suspicious of the motives of others.

As these emotionally wounded children get older, they leave some of their childhood behaviors behind, but they still have the wounded inner child deep within their psyche. When these adults are stressed, pressured, or begin to feel overwhelmed, they often drop back to familiar behavior patterns and the behaviors they used as children to get their way.

It is also possible for a wounded inner child to crave attention and a sense of belonging they never experienced. In these situations, individuals with this wounded inner child may tolerate behavior in a relationship that is negative, destructive, and abusive. This is a coping mechanism to attempt to gain a sense of belonging in relationships, which is something they desire at a deep emotional level.

Signs of a Wounded Inner Child

Recognizing the signs of a wounded inner child in a prospective partner is essential in forming a healthy relationship. While it is possible to address the hurt, anger, frustration, and overwhelm that wounded inner child is expressing, it is not something you can do on your own.

He or she has to want to make a change. This starts with seeking a therapist to help to understand the wounded inner child and to make positive changes.

Abrupt responses to negative comments or events—adults who are not flexible and cannot accept criticism, negative comments, or changes in plans or events are often harboring a wounded inner child. Be aware of extreme drama and responses to anything negative; even small changes in events and critical comments may be a trigger.

Masking the emotions—sometimes children pretend to be accepting of a situation, but it is evident by their actions they are upset. In some cases, the individual may be able to mask the emotions or responses completely for a while, and then it all breaks down. This is often a response of an inner wounded child looking for attention and approval from someone else.

Manipulating situations—the manipulation of the thoughts and emotions of others to get what they want is a common behavior for these children. When it is done as an adult, it is devastating to the trust and respect in the relationship. It is better to be honest and speak a truth the other person may not want to hear than try to manipulate the situation or pretend the problem does not exist.

Everyone has times when they behave in less-than-adult ways, particularly when they are disappointed, frustrated, hurt, or angry. However, when these types of behaviors become the default option in a dating relationship, it is time to make changes or leave for a healthier, more positive partner.

Article written by to learn more on the author click: Sherry Gaba, LCSW, is a licensed psychotherapist/author specializing in addictions, codependency, and underlying issues such as depression, trauma, and anxiety.

How to Practice Mindfulness

Fri, 05 Mar 2021 16:08:04 GMT

5 Tips No One Has Told You

Mindfulness is a paradox. It’s the easiest thing in the world and the hardest thing in the world. Let me explain. Look at your right hand. See the shades of color in your skin? Notice the lines on your palm and the lines that separate the segments of your fingers? Easy to see, right? You just brought mindfulness to your right hand in this moment. Now, consider the task of facing your deepest grief and sorrow. Or reflect on how it might be for you to bring your attention to extreme physical pain, hour after hour. Much more difficult to bring your curious and open mindfulness to deep and real suffering, isn’t it?

But, you can cultivate your mindfulness. Here are 5 tips to find success with your mindfulness practice, whether you are new to mindfulness or someone who has been experiencing some hiccups in your practice.

Tip #1: Start with the easy stuff.

In order to boost your motivation and self-efficacy, build your mindfulness “muscle” by more closely sensing the natural warmth in your chest, the coolness of one sip of water, and the weight of your left foot when you take a step. At your next meal, pay attention to the flavors of not only your first few bites (the easiest parts of a meal to be mindful of) but several bites later.

Tip #2: Don’t meditate for 1 hour a day.

The traditional meditation lore has sometimes implored people to commit to 45 minutes to 1 hour of mindful sitting per day. This is wonderful for those who have high self-regulation and prudence, but as these are the least common character strengths around the globe, many people are excluded. There are now a large number of studies that show people benefit from brief mindfulness practices. And, neuroscience is revealing that brief meditation practice can cause important changes in our brains.

In terms of time, there is no magic number. Instead, start with what you are willing to do to establish a routine — perhaps 5 minutes a day? Carve out the time, no matter how little, by linking it with something that will help you remember to do it — with a meal, as you get out of bed each morning, or before you start your car. Be consistent.

Tip #3: Practice ANY type of mindfulness you wish.

Go where your motivation is highest. I once created a regular mindfulness practice out of watching one of my sons play in the sandbox. Every day after he came home from school, we would go outside. He would sit in the sandbox and play and I would sit in a chair, alongside of him, quietly following my breathing and giving him undivided mindful attention. Actually, playing in a sandbox has been shown to be very hypnotic and absorbing in itself so perhaps my son was meditating while I was mindfully meditating as well!

The point here is don’t feel your practice MUST be a sitting meditation. Remember that the word “mindful” is an adverb that can describe any action you are taking. What are you most motivated to make a regular habit? Mindful walking each morning? Mindful eating of a snack in the evening? Or, mindful breathing outside as you overlook your backyard? Follow your motivation. But, do make note that there is a big difference between “going for a walk” and “mindful walking.”

Tip #4: Forgive yourself, repeatedly.

There’s a lot to be said about being compassionate and forgiving with yourself, especially when it comes to building in a new self-care practice like mindfulness. And, researchers in self-compassion have been having a field-day around the many benefits that come from self-compassion. Here’s the gist of it applied here:

When you forget to practice, forgive yourself.

When you get lost in busy-ness, forgive yourself.

When you are inconsistent with your daily practice, forgive yourself.

When your mind wanders incessantly, forgive yourself.

Spend MORE time thinking about what you did do than ruminating about what you didn’t do.

Tip #5: Use your natural energy sources.

When difficulties arise in your mindfulness practice, why not see them as par for the course? Since every person experiencing obstacles to meditation, why not view these as normal? Might you see them as opportunities to learn and grow from?

Your highest strengths of character (called “signature strengths” by scientists) are likely to be your best and most energizing parts of you. Why not use these to your advantage?

Whatever character strength you are high in, consider how you can use it to overcome what is getting in your way. For example, use your strength in gratitude when your mind starts to wander a lot (expressing gratitude that you have a mind and that you’re able to be aware when it wanders off!) Use your prudence strength to plan out a schedule. Use your humility when discomfort arises in your body and curiosity when your mind continues to wrap around a worry. Here’s an article offering examples for each of the 24 strengths and how you can bring them to your mindfulness practice (" 24 ways to make mindfulness stickier ").

Author Ryan M. Niemiec, Psy.D. , is the education director at the VIA Institute on Character.

Online: VIA Institute on Character, Twitter, LinkedIn

Click to see full article How To Practice Mindfulness

Reference:

Niemiec, R. M. (2014). Mindfulness and character strengths: A practical guide to flourishing. Cambridge, MA: Hogrefe.

The Magic Power of Purpose

Wed, 24 Feb 2021 16:35:12 GMT

A Simple Strategy to Achieve Your Desired Goals

Living without purpose is living in a state of limbo that will get you nowhere and can be very stressful and full of uncertainty. The only certain thing that can happen to anyone who lives without purpose is that his or her life is empty and becoming emptier day by day. This kind of life is dull and duller.

Living on purpose, on the other hand, is living in continuous awareness and with a deeper understanding and knowledge that you have many choices in your life. With these choices come greater responsibility on your part. That is, it’s your responsibility to make the best choice out of many different choices that are available.

Living on purpose is also about living your life aligned with your true nature, your beliefs, your values, your vision, and your purpose.

I’m sure each of us would love to see and enjoy the story with the happy ending where our dreams become reality in our lifetime. To make this possible, we have to be willing to open ourselves by applying the living-on-purpose model in our lives. We practice living on purpose if we follow this simple step-by-step plan.

A. Write a simple and brief statement that clearly expresses your purpose, your vision, and your passion. What do you live for? What truly matters to you?

Make sure to keep the statement brief. Use a positive tone. Write what you do want, not what you don’t want.

Make your statement very specific, clear, and achievable.

Make it personal and authentic to your own so that you can fully connect with it.

Work with the words you write until you truly feel them deep inside your mind and your heart.

Trust that what you want is being accomplished.

For instance:

Every single thing that I do, I do it in the spirit of love.

I’m a good person and excellent leader.

I have total self-confidence in everything I do.

I have the talents, knowledge, and discipline to achieve________ [Name your desired goal].

B. Do this PRP (pause, reflect, and pray) every day, especially before you make any important decision or take any significant action.

Take several deep, relaxing breaths.

Gently close your eyes at the moment when you feel fully comfortable.

Feel the fresh air flowing throughout your body.

Speak your phrase seven times (silently or out loud).

Practice this exercise persistently and regularly during your busy days to reconnect to your inner-self.

Always remember what is most important to you. Why do you do what you do?

C. Establish a real connection between your deeper purpose, vision, or dream and any specific action you’re about to take. Specific actions with a bridge to your deeper purpose can include the following:

A one-on-one meeting with your manager, professor, or a potential client.

Any important engagement with individuals or a group.

Any important telephone call, e-mail, memo, and anything you write.

D. Keep a daily journal. Write what you’re experiencing in your journal every day. Do this persistently, even if you write only a few words. After a month, you’ll reap the benefits of doing this positive exercise.

E. As in any good mind-body-spirit exercise, if you find yourself forgetting or losing focus, don’t worry! It’s not the end of the world. Begin again and lift yourself out of your frustration, self-destructive criticism, or over-analysis of why you didn’t do something. Make sure to pause for a moment when you get distracted. Start again, and you’re back on the right track. It isn’t how many times you have fallen that count; it’s how many times you get up. What counts is when you wake up, stand up, and start toward your goal again.

By Joshua W. Utomo , MDiv, DHyp, CHt,

Gratitude

Thu, 11 Feb 2021 16:53:50 GMT

Practicing Gratitude

Gratitude is the expression of appreciation for what one has. It is a recognition of value independent of monetary worth. Spontaneously generated from within, it is an affirmation of goodness and warmth. This social emotion strengthens relationships, and its roots run deep in evolutionary history—emanating from the survival value of helping others and being helped in return. Studies show that specific areas of the brain are involved in experiencing and expressing gratitude. Brain scans of people assigned a task that stimulates expression of gratitude show lasting changes in the prefrontal cortex that heighten sensitivity to future experiences of gratitude.

What Is Gratitude?

Gratitude is a spontaneous feeling but, increasingly, research demonstrates its value as a practice—that is, making conscious efforts to count one’s blessings. Studies show that people can deliberately cultivate gratitude—and there are important social and personal benefits to doing so. It is possible to feel grateful for loved ones, colleagues, animals, nature, and life in general. The emotion generates a climate of positivity that both reaches inward and extends outward.

Is gratitude an emotion?

Gratitude is an emotion, one that makes a person feel happier. Gratefulness is also a mood as well as a personality trait. Some people are just more inclined to feel grateful as a daily habit.

Is gratitude a feeling?

Gratitude is both a temporary feeling and a dispositional trait. In both cases, gratitude involves a process of recognizing, first, that one has obtained a positive outcome and, second, that there is an external source for that good outcome.

Why Gratitude Matters

Psychologists find that, over time, feeling grateful boosts happiness and fosters both physical and psychological health, even among those already struggling with mental health problems. Studies show that practicing gratitude curbs the use of words expressing negative emotions and shifts inner attention away from such negative emotions as resentment and envy, minimizing the possibility of ruminating, which is a hallmark of depression.

Does gratitude reduce stress?

People who are grateful feel less pain, less stress, suffer insomnia less, have stronger immune systems, experience healthier relationships, and do better academically and professionally. Overall it can boost both your mental and your physical health .

Are grateful people less depressed?

Grateful people are indeed less likely to have mental health problems like depression. One study found that a gratitude intervention was successful in reducing negative affect and increasing mental resilience in a group of older adults.

Can gratitude help you engage in better self-care?

One study suggests that spending only a few minutes engaging in a gratitude activity, such as writing a letter of gratitude to a loved one, can motivate you to make healthy food choices.

How to Cultivate Gratitude

Gratitude starts with noticing the goodness in life. A materialistic culture that encourages constant wanting and sees possessions as the source of happiness is not the most fertile ground for gratitude. But it is not an insurmountable barrier to developing it. Envy and especially cynicism and narcissism are similarly thieves of gratitude. In fact, the cultivation of gratitude may be at least a partial remedy for narcissism.

How do you practice gratitude?

Just being around your family and friends can help you feel more grateful. Also, being more appreciative of life and feeling less cynical pushes you in a more thankful frame of mind. At other times, when you are facing a tough decision, seeing it as a gift is useful, some people wouldn’t mind having such a decision to make.

What makes a person feel grateful?

This depends on the person, and we all differ in the degree to which we are inclined to experience and express gratitude . It can be something as simple as a healthy spring shower, just because the rain washes everything clean. Engaging in a more specific act, such as volunteering to help others, makes people feel good about themselves.

Is gratitude contagious?

Gratitude is a social emotion and the expression of gratitude toward others compounds its benefits. The emotion literally pays itself forward. And it almost does not matter whether the gratitude is communicated or reciprocated by others.

Tips to Foster Gratitude

-Keep a journal of or in some way note big and little joys of daily life.

-Write down "three good things"—identify three things that have gone well for you and identify the cause.

-Write thank-you notes to others.

-Think about people who have inspired you and what about them was most significant.

-Engage in "mental subtraction." Imagine what your life would be like if some positive event had not occurred.

Click for link to article

Tools and Technology to Upgrade Your Yoga Practice

Tue, 02 Feb 2021 15:43:07 GMT

Upgrade Your Yoga Practice

Today's yoga isn't about isolating yourself in a mountain cave until you achieve enlightenment. Instead, you'll find that modern technology can actually enhance your practice, adding comfort and convenience to your yoga sessions and helping you commit to a lifelong practice.

Try these four tips for integrating tools and technology into the time you spend on the mat.

Set a Goal

In life, goals drive you forward. Setting goals for your yoga practice is also important, and it doesn't have to be about "achieving" a certain pose. Instead, you can set goals to practice a certain number of times per week or to try a new style or a new teacher at least once a month. Coach.me's habit-tracking app is free to use; you might also try goal-setting apps like Strides , Way of Life, and Habitica to help you stick to new habits and routines. These apps offer various ways to monitor and reward your progress. If you’re practicing in an area with limited Wi-Fi, a mobile hotspot could help. These devices allow you access the internet without having to hook up to Wi-Fi, and some wireless providers offer lower-priced hotspots as part of seasonal sales throughout the year.

Take Risks

This doesn't mean doing a handstand on the edge of a cliff. Instead, it simply means stepping outside your comfort zone. There are thousands of yoga poses and variations, so there's no reason to get stuck doing the same ones every day. Challenge yourself to try new teachers. Sites like DoYogaWithMe, Alo Moves, MyYogaWorks , and Yoga Download give you access to a wide variety of teachers and class styles, so you can always invite something new into your practice. Then, try going to a new studio or booking a week at a yoga retreat.

Meditate

Yoga prepares the body for meditation, so don't forget to include a meditation session after your practicing yoga—or any time throughout your day! Get the pillows, bolsters, and blocks you need to help you take a comfortable seated position. If you're comfortable, you'll meet less resistance and distraction from your body as you try to quiet your mind. Employ apps like Headspace and Buddhify to bring structure to your meditation until—and maybe well after—you get the hang of it.

Know It's Okay to Fail

There is no failure when it comes to yoga. The only way to fail is to not do it. If you're practicing, you're making progress. You'll see changes in your poses, patience, strength, flexibility, and more as time goes on, but the only way to see those changes is to get on your mat on a regular basis.

There's very little in life we can do without the risk of failure. You might lose your balance and fall down. You might get off track and miss a few days or a few weeks. You might find that everyone's favorite yoga, meditation, or goal-setting app really doesn't work for you. The good news is you can get back into the pose, start again, or try a new app. As long as you keep coming back, you can't fail.

There are many tech tools that can enhance your yoga practice and keep you moving forward. By setting goals, taking risks, exploring meditation, and practicing yoga consistently, you can improve your yoga sessions.

Of course, yoga isn’t the only way to practice self-care. For more practical ways to care for your physical and mental health, check out our blog !

Article by Kimberly Hayes , Chief Blogger

How does EMDR Therapy Affect the Brain?

Thu, 21 Jan 2021 16:34:15 GMT

Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing Therapy

From EMDRIA

EMDR International Association

Our brains have a natural way to recover from traumatic memories and events. This process involves communication between the amygdala (the alarm signal for stressful events), the hippocampus (which assists with learning, including memories about safety and danger), and the prefrontal cortex (which analyzes and controls behavior and emotion). While many times traumatic experiences can be managed and resolved spontaneously, they may not be processed without help.

Stress responses are part of our natural fight, flight, or freeze instincts. When distress from a disturbing event remains, the upsetting images, thoughts, and emotions may create feelings of overwhelm, of being back in that moment, or of being “frozen in time.” EMDR therapy helps the brain process these memories, and allows normal healing to resume. The experience is still remembered, but the fight, flight, or freeze response from the original event is resolved.”

Click here for more on the author and EMDR

Benefits of Remote Teletherapy Services- A New Era

Sat, 16 Jan 2021 16:00:39 GMT

Teletherapy is a Gift

We are faced with new and changing times throughout the world today. Changes not only related to the current state of affairs due to COVID-19 but also in part due to advances in technology. During these changing times, hopefully the majority will embrace the innovative ventures that coincide. For the field of therapy and mental health, a developing way of providing services has vastly emerged and been incorporated. Although teletherapy services previously existed, the current pandemic has led to a surge in these services and may become the new “norm” in mental health care. With change comes excitement and resistance alike. The aim here is to highlight the vast benefits of teletherapy services in the field of psychotherapy and mental health care.

What is Teletherapy?

Teletherapy is the same as traditional therapy except the setting is your home or chosen space. The therapist and you or group meet remotely on a private video platform or via phone. The use of teletherapy provides the benefit of readily available services to a larger number of people with the ease of meeting on your schedule. Many therapists providing teletherapy services operate within nontraditional hours, thus presenting the ability to accommodate almost any schedule. Without the need for an outside office space, fees in some cases, may be reduced due to less operating expenses for the clinician. Seeking and partaking in therapy can be more successful within a remote platform versus driving to an office. Healing services are available to those who otherwise may not be able to seek traditional therapy for a variety of reasons such as lack of transportation. Groups or individuals can meet for support from anywhere at anytime. Additionally, teletherapy can increase the number of people who seek services by reducing stigmas around initially seeking mental health support. Even specialized treatments, such as eye movement desensitization reprocessing (EMDR) therapy, are proven effective when offered in a remote setting.

Is Teletherapy Effective?

Formalized research investigating the effectiveness of teletherapy began prior to the pandemic and supports the setting in providing quality care for a variety of mental health conditions. Platforms for providing services are HIPPA compliant and confidential to protect patient privacy. The current crisis has led to new learning and acceptance on this effective way of delivering mental health services. Greater amounts of people are isolated and experiencing feelings of loneliness, along with a rise in other mental health concerns such as depression, anxiety, substance use, and posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), due to the pandemic. Studies examining teletherapy , as compared to face-to-face settings, concluded effective reduction in symptoms related to PTSD with remote treatment, as one example. A multitude of treatments are proven effective with use of teletherapy along with offering many other benefits outlined here. Although teletherapy services have increased this is not an unusual method for providing therapy.

Embracing the Change

Embrace the global change in the way therapy healing is expanding! Teletherapy will have a positive impact on the field of mental health and increased accessibility to services. Perhaps through the surge to provide these services many will understand the vast benefits that exist for current and future care. Although current events pushed all into this environment, evidence does support the efficacy of treatment provided in a teletherapy setting. The future of mental health care will be advanced by providing this robust method of delivering effective treatment and healing support for more people. The ability to meet with a mental health provider for remote video and phone therapy services is a gift. Clinicians and patients alike can benefit from this form of mental health service capability.

Maggie Lavey holds an MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling with a specialization in addiction treatment; current doctoral student as a PsyD. with emphasis on Health and Wellness. Maggie is an experienced Associate Professional Clinical Counselor and trained EMDR therapist providing video remote therapy for a variety of mental health specializations. Other certifications include 500hour-Registered Yoga Teacher and Certified Meditation Teacher.

Meditation and Yoga Can Improve Mental Health

Fri, 08 Jan 2021 21:30:27 GMT

Mediation and Yoga for Mental Health

Yoga and mindfulness meditation are associated with improvements in physical and mental health, according to new research published in the journal Frontiers in Human Neuroscience.

The study followed participants in a three-month intensive yoga and meditation retreat. Participants showed improvements in biological markers of stress and inflammation. Participants also reported lower levels of anxiety and depression.

Participants in the study experienced increases in the so-called cortisol awakening process (CAR). CAR is a measure of how and when the body releases the stress hormone cortisol . This is one way to measure resilience to stress .

This strengthens evidence for a link between mental and physical health, suggesting improvements in mental health could alter some risk factors for disease.

Contributed by Zawn Villines, Good Therapy.org Correspondent

The Psychology Of New Years Resolutions

Thu, 31 Dec 2020 16:54:14 GMT

New Year Resolutions

esearch has shown that about half of all adults make New Year’s resolutions. However, fewer than 10% manage to keep them for more than a few months.

As a professor of behavioural addiction I know how easy people can fall into bad habits and why on trying to give up those habits it is easy to relapse. Resolutions usually come in the form of lifestyle changes and changing behavior that has become routine and habitual (even if they are not problematic) can be hard to do.

The most common resolutions are: losing weight, doing more exercise, quitting smoking and saving money.

The main reason that people don’t stick to their resolutions is that they set too many or they’re unrealistic to achieve. They may also be victims of “ false hope syndrome” . False hope syndrome is characterized by a person’s unrealistic expectations about the likely speed, amount, ease and consequences of changing their behavior.

For some people, it takes something radical for them to change their ways. It took a medical diagnosis to make me give up alcohol and caffeine and it took pregnancy for my partner to give up smoking.

To change your day-to-day behaviour you also have to change your thinking. But there are tried and tested ways that can help people stick to their resolutions – here are my personal favorites:

Be realistic. You need to begin by making resolutions that you can keep and that are practical. If you want to reduce your alcohol intake because you tend to drink alcohol every day, don’t immediately go teetotal. Try to cut out alcohol every other day or have a drink once every three days. Also, breaking up the longer-term goal into more manageable short-term goals can be beneficial and more rewarding. The same principle can be applied to exercise or eating more healthily.

Do one thing at a time. One of the easiest routes to failure is to have too many resolutions. If you want to be fitter and healthier, do just one thing at a time. Give up drinking. Give up smoking. Join a gym. Eat more healthily. But don’t do them all at once, just choose one and do your best to stick to it. Once you have got one thing under your control, you can begin a second resolution.

Be SMART. Anyone working in a job that includes setting goals will know that goals should be SMART, that is, specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-bound. Resolutions shouldn’t be any different. Cutting down alcohol drinking is an admirable goal, but it’s not SMART. Drinking no more than two units of alcohol every other day for one month is a SMART resolution. Connecting the resolution to a specific goal can also be motivating, for example, dropping a dress size or losing two inches off your waistline in time for the next summer holiday.

Tell someone your resolution. Letting family and friends know that you have a New Year’s resolution that you really want to keep will act as both a safety barrier and a face-saver. If you really want to cut down smoking or drinking, real friends won’t put temptation in your way and can help monitor your behaviour. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and support from those around you.

Change your behaviour with others. Trying to change habits on your own can be difficult. For instance, if you and your partner both smoke, drink and eat unhealthily, it is really hard for one partner to change their behaviour if the other is still engaged in the same old bad habits. By having the same resolution, such as going on a diet, the chances of success will improve.

Don’t Limit Yourself

Changing your behaviour, or some aspect of it, doesn’t have to be restricted to the start of the New Year. It can be anytime.

Accept lapses as part of the process. It’s inevitable that when trying to give up something (alcohol, cigarettes, junk food) that there will be lapses. You shouldn’t feel guilty about giving in to your cravings but accept that it is part of the learning process. Bad habits can take years to become ingrained and there are no quick fixes in making major lifestyle changes. These may be clichés but we learn by our mistakes and every day is a new day – and you can start each day afresh.

If you think this all sounds like too much hard work and that it’s not worth making resolutions to begin with, bear in mind that people who make New Year’s resolutions are ten times more likely to achieve their goals than those who don’t.

Author Mark Griffiths, Director of the International Gaming Research Unit and Professor of Behavioural Addiction, Nottingham Trent University

Seasonal Affective Disorder Survival Guide

Tue, 29 Dec 2020 17:17:27 GMT

How to Care for Yourself When You Have SAD

Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is a form of depression that is most commonly triggered by winter. Per Psychology Today, an estimated 10 million people in America struggle with seasonal depression and its symptoms every year. The disorder is more common in women than men, and the onset typically begins with adulthood from ages 18 to 30.

SAD is challenging, but there are ways to cope. Start by exploring these tips from Counseling Anywhere :

Symptoms of SAD include:

● Feelings of despair and depression

● Lethargy and oversleeping

● A change in appetite that mostly craves junk food (sweets, starches, fats, etc.)

● Weight gain

● Problems with concentration

● Avoiding socialization

● Constantly feeling aggravated

● Loneliness

● General discontent

● Possible thoughts of suicide or self-harm

What Causes Seasonal Depression?

The exact cause of seasonal depression is unknown, but researchers have some theories. For people who experience SAD in autumn and winter, the shorter days and lack of sunlight can affect the body’s circadian rhythm and the quality of rest. Reduced sunlight can also cause a drop in serotonin , a neurotransmitter that reduces anxiety and prevents depression. On the other hand, it can spur an increase in the neurochemical melatonin, which can make a person feel lethargic and sad. As Everyday Health explains, some researchers also point to a lack of vitamin D absorption via the sun and its depression-like symptoms.

Furthermore, people with a history of major depression are more susceptible to SAD. However, there is a big difference between the two disorders. Major depression is an abnormal emotional state that persists beyond seasonal depression. It is a medical condition that should be treated by a doctor with prescription antidepressants, talk therapy , or a combination of both. On the other hand, seasonal depression can be managed with other methods, though some people find medication and talk therapy helpful.

Treating Seasonal Affective Disorder

As stated above, medication and professionally guided therapy are important treatments for seasonal affective disorder. However, some people don’t want to commit to taking medication or finding a therapist for a condition they only notice a few months of the year. For these people, alternative treatments are available, though one should always talk to a doctor before starting any kind of regimen.

● Light box therapy mimics sunshine in an effort to regulate the body and treat seasonal depression. The therapy involves sitting in front of a light box for about 30 minutes a day—typically in the morning—to wake the body and suppress melatonin.

● Some experts recommend adding energy-boosting supplements to your diet, though it’s always important to discuss this decision with your doctor beforehand. Once you’ve been given the all-clear, look for supplements to help give you a much-needed increase in energy as well as support your mental wellness.

● Dawn-simulating alarm clocks gently wake the body with artificial sunlight that gradually gets brighter. Dawn simulation works in a similar manner as light box therapy to treat mild SAD.

● Aromatherapy stimulates areas of the brain to help control moods and promote relaxation.

● Exercise helps boost serotonin, correcting the imbalance caused by SAD. Furthermore, it offsets any weight gain caused by seasonal depression.

● Creating a happy and healthy atmosphere in the home can drastically improve a person’s mood. Adding more light to rooms, increasing fresh air with houseplants, and adding more color to decor can help beat depression. Redecorating also distracts the brain with activity.

● Spend time in natural sunlight as much as possible to increase vitamin D absorption. If spending time in the sun is not possible, consider adding a vitamin D supplement to your diet.

Seasonal affective disorder is a condition that affects millions of people, usually in the winter months. While the exact cause is unknown, science points to a lack of sunlight’s effect on the body’s natural chemistry. Artificial sunlight, aromatherapy, exercise, a new atmosphere, and an increase in vitamin D can help treat SAD in a natural manner. You can also look to Counseling Anywhere for a personalized therapeutic approach to your concerns.

Author Kimberly Hayes

Chief Blogger for Public Health Alert, Click here

Five Poses to Survive Your Family This Holiday

Mon, 28 Dec 2020 16:57:11 GMT

Does your family of origin know exactly how to push your buttons? This sequence will help you react and communicate from your true self, not your childhood self.

It’s often called “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year,” but the Holidays are often the most challenging. Even those of us with dedicated practices can experience frustration and anger with our families.

Renowned spiritual teacher Ram Dass famously said, “If you think you are enlightened, go spend a week with your family.” I personally cannot count the amount of holidays I was wrapping my legs behind my head doing Ashtanga in the hallway to stay sane, while my family members wrapped gifts in the other room.

Why do we get so triggered?

Often, our mind is hijacked by old relationship dynamics and familiar scripts. We lose the clarity of the present moment and connection to our true Self. We start responding as if we were 10 years old again, instead of the more evolved adult we have become.

See also 4-Step Meditation to Beat Holiday Stress

Luckily, we can call on yoga to help. Our practice is truly the gift that keeps on giving. As children and teens, managing our feelings and making sense of emotions might have been challenging. Now as adults, we have skills we can employ when frustrated or sad, such as language, self-compassion, and even specific poses. This can be incredibly healing!

Beneath even the most meaningful layers, like our identity and familial connection, there is a place inside of us that is eternal and invincible. This is a place of love, patience, connection, and generosity. This is our true nature. We glimpse this place every time we get on the mat, but we can also quickly lose it when we start fighting our brother for the remote control or mom comments on our weight.

This five-pose sequence will help you survive family during the holidays by reconnecting you to your true Self. You don’t need much space or time to do this! Whether you commandeer a bathroom for ten minutes or sequester yourself in the basement, this sequence will help you stay grounded in connection, so that you can give and receive love freely.

Sukhasana (Easy Pose)

The first step to coming back to the present moment is to get grounded in who we are. And the best place to do that is to literally come to the ground! This seat is a staple meditation pose and hip-opener. It is also a helpful shape for accessing our root chakra, muladhara, which is located at the base of the pelvic floor. The root chakra relates to issues of security, survival, and family. Accessing this powerful energy center helps us feel more secure and confident. By owning who we are today, we are also honoring who we were yesterday.

Cat/Cow (Marjaryasana/Bitilasana)

You know that feeling in your belly like an elevator is dropping? That is our sympathetic nervous system responding as if we are in grave danger. However, this system cannot tell the difference between a tiger and your little sister. When we are threatened, our instinct is to respond in one of three ways: fight, flight, or freeze. Unfortunately, in the modern era, we get stressed and triggered all the time without being able to move that energy through our body. Because of Cat/Cow’s dynamic nature, taking a few rounds of these when the triggered can be helpful in moving energy through the body via the breath. Inhale in Cow. Exhale in Cat. Repeat for a few minutes.

Low Lunge (Anjaneyasana)

One of the primary muscles related to the body’s fear response is the psoas. A main function of these muscles (we have one on each side) is to flex the hips, meaning bringing the thigh bone up to the chest, which is a crucial action to protect vital organs. When we are in fear or under high stress, the psoas can become overactive. A chronically tight psoas has been linked to a host of challenges, such as digestive issues and anxiety. The shape of the back leg in low lunge helps to release the the psoas from its chronic gripping. Low Lunge will also help get the breath moving since the top of the psoas and diaphragm are close neighbors. (Liz Koch; Psoas Book)

Knees to Chest (Apanasana)

Now that we are grounded, the nervous system has settled, and the psoas is released, we can start to shift our energy toward reconnection and self-love. Apanasana is not only a great way to release the lower back and help with digestion, but it is an energetic hug for your whole being. What makes the holidays healing is that they are an opportunity to re-pattern our normal responses. They can remind us that no matter what is happening around us or outside of us, we are always connected to the universe within. We are always love.

Corpse Pose (Savasana)

Ending this brief sequence with a Savasana may seem frivolous at first, but one could say that the previous poses were really just preparation for this moment, just as all of your memories and experiences have prepared you for who you are now. The translation of Savasana is corpse pose. It is an opportunity to shed the parts of yourself that no longer serve you, and to open yourself for the next iteration of who you are to become. The very shape of Savasana – palms up, front body exposed – is one of receptivity. Before you return to join the family, observe how you feel after your practice and remember that this feeling of peace is not something that we just lose when we roll up our mat. This peace is always there. It is your true nature.

Article by Author

SARAH EZRIN

DECEMBER 15, 2019

Click here to learn more: https://www.yogajournal.com/practice/5-poses-to-survive-your-family-this-holiday/

Holiday Depression and the Most Wonderful Time of the year

Wed, 16 Dec 2020 18:23:07 GMT

Bringing Joy back into Your Life During the Holiday Season

So many people go bonkers for the holidays. Between Thanksgiving, Friendsgiving, Christmas shopping, Christmas tree decoration, gift wrapping, holiday office parties, ugly Christmas sweater contests, Hanukah, and holiday travel, it can be exciting for most but very stressful for others. As we just finished wrapping up Thanksgiving, we are now in full-fledged Christmas mode; houses have lights strung on their roofs, holiday music is playing in every store, and Christmas tree lots are busier than ever.

What if the holiday season is not the most wonderful time of the year for you? Maybe you are struggling with loneliness or are grieving a family member. Perhaps you are struggling financially and are not able to purchase gifts this year. It could be that being around family during the holidays is a trigger for your addiction or eating disorder. Other common triggers for holiday sadness include stress, fatigue, unrealistic expectations, and over-commercialization. Many individuals find the holidays intolerable for many reasons, especially if they suffer from “holiday depression.” Of course, you do not want to be the downer or the bah humbug of your friend or family circle, so how do you find common ground, if the holidays are not your cup of tea?

“Holiday depression”

The term holiday depression is used in mainstream society and is not recognized by mental health professionals. However, therapists do agree that depression and anxiety tend to heighten during the holiday season and this most likely why our society has coined this catchy phrase, holiday depression". The demands and stress of the holidays and the expectations to be happy can make an individual feel even more depressed, especially if he/she is already struggling with a mood disorder.

The holidays can also be a trigger for individuals who struggle with seasonal depression, a class of depression that is recognized by mental health experts and physicians. Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is a seasonal depression that peaks in the winter months due to shorter days and decreased sunlight. Decreased levels of serotonin, increased levels of melatonin, low levels of vitamin D, and a disruption in circadian rhythms are known triggers of seasonal affective disorder. Individuals who live in colder, snowy areas and areas that are farther from the equator are more at risk for seasonal affective disorder.

What helps?

The treatment for seasonal affective disorder consists of a combination of anti-depressants and lightbox therapy. Treating and preventing “holiday depression” can be a little more complicated and involve lifestyle modifications and personal responsibility. The following are ways to help manage or prevent “holiday depression”:

Set realistic expectations: Instead of attending a handful of holiday parties, only commit to one, or maybe skip the holiday parties altogether this year. Having high hopes for the holidays can be stressful and can potentially cause you to spiral. It is perfectly okay to stay home, not making any plans, and do what makes you feel happy.

Avoid triggering family members: Maybe you have an uncle who makes jokes about your sexual orientation or who does not respect your sobriety. Maybe there are one or two family members who continuously shame your views of politics or religion. There is absolutely no rule stating you must spend time with these people, even around the holidays. If you have family members that are triggering and cause you a lot of stress, then avoid them, even if it means skipping out on the family gathering. Your mental health will benefit from this.

Being alone is okay: Maybe this is your first holiday alone, and you don’t want to decorate the tree by yourself; you should do it anyway. If you enjoy holiday decorations, then you should spend time enjoying decorating your home and a tree. Turn on some Christmas music or movies and enjoy yourself. The same goes for making cookies, cooking Christmas dinner, and wrapping gifts. You are capable of doing all of these festivities alone, especially if it brings you joy.

Travel: Maybe you want to skip the holidays altogether and go out of town to get away and reflect. Traveling is always a great way to escape the hustle and bustle of the holiday season.

Talk to a therapist: Maybe this is your first holiday without your spouse or your children. This time of year can be especially triggering if you are still grieving a loved one. Talking to a mental health expert about your feelings can help you from becoming self-destructive during this time of year. It can also give you coping skills that can help you process your grief.

Ultimately it is up to you to decide how you are going to spend this holiday season. Our society puts a lot of pressure on us during this time of year, but it is essential to take the time and space to decide what makes you happy. This holiday season will pass, regardless of how you spend it. Your life will never be dictated by how you spent the holidays. Be sure to take each day as it comes and remember that it is okay if this is not “your most wonderful time of the year.”

Getting a bit personal

Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday. This year was my second year in a row, not celebrating Thanksgiving (or Christmas). I love spending time with my family, cooking and eating fantastic food, and hanging out all day in our pajamas. Unfortunately, last year, I was working abroad in Tanzania, and this year, my family celebrated the holiday in Florida while I was stuck in a snowstorm back home in Mammoth. Did this make me sad? Yes. However, last year, I went on an African safari on Thanksgiving Day, and this year, I went skiing with my dog. I have learned that I can sit on my couch and feel sorry for myself, or I can spend time doing things that I love, even if it means that I am away from my friends and family. There are always coping strategies for people who are forced to spend the holiday alone, and sometimes you have to dig a little deeper to bring that joy back into your life.

Article by Kristen Fuller, M.D.

For more on the author click here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/experts/kristen-fuller-md

What most people don't know about Trauma and Addiction

Tue, 24 Nov 2020 16:37:49 GMT

The link between trauma and addiction

f you are like most people, you may think addiction is a rampant problem in our society. And you're partially right. It is. But that misses the forest for the trees. It's not the root problem itself. It's actually a failed solution to the underlying problem: the pandemic of unhealed, psychological trauma. It’s essential to realize that addiction is often the symptom of the problem in reality. It's no coincidence that about 28 percent of those with diagnosable PTSD have an addiction issue and another 35 percent have a full-blown, serious, physiologically-dependent addiction. The good news is it's very treatable, but it takes effort. So, a more relevant question when thinking of addiction, is not why the addiction, but first, what's the pain and past traumatic event(s) driving it?

The sooner we understand this, the better. If you're reading this, the odds are that you know someone struggling in the throes of addiction. Approximately 50 percent of clients in the U.S. pursuing mental health services are directly or indirectly affected by addiction (and therefore psychological trauma too, by default). If you or health professionals focus only on their addiction, again they'd be missing the bigger picture. The real problem is the pain and trauma (often rooted in deep relational ruptures) driving the addiction.

With psychological trauma, the brain's alert system (limbic system or fear center) can get locked "on." When this happens, the rational and decision-making part of our brain, the outer cortical layers essentially shut down because all the blood flow goes to the panic system. Addiction then starts to serve as an effective short-term remedy for this, but an increasingly deleterious long-term, creating another serious problem.

What does this mean in terms of healing addiction and trauma? Addiction is the failed attempt to heal and treat the underlying pain residing from untreated emotional wounds. Actually, the opposite of addiction is more trauma relief and healing, and human connection. So, they must be healed concurrently, as Jaime Marich beautifully explains. People and health professionals often assume that all is needed is to treat only trauma or only addiction instead of carefully heeding both. The general public also may often think that if you heal one of them, the other will also naturally heal on its own. This is a misconception. All too frequently in addiction treatment, like in 12-step groups, the psychological trauma fueling the addiction can be neglected. Moreover, many of my international and national colleagues fear treating psychological trauma. They avoid it or refer out. Don't get me wrong, there has been progress here, especially with the recent advent of trauma-informed care, but still, a considerable degree of "trauma resistance" in the mental health field remains.

Compared to depression, which can be significantly helped by antidepressants alone (arguably not thoroughly cured by any means); there's no magic bullet for healing psychological trauma. The same applies, for example, to bipolar and psychosis; psychotropic medication significantly helps but not so much with trauma. With PTSD, psychotropic medication may also help with symptom reduction, but nothing medically can be given to fully heal psychological trauma. The good news is the brain can be trained to not go into fight-flight-freeze (or trauma-mode) so easily, but it takes mindfulness, quality psychotherapy like EMDR, holistic healing methods, and dedication. Fortunately, contrary to popular belief, it doesn't necessarily need to take a lot of time. EMDR, for example, often only takes three to six sessions to notice a significant change in healing trauma and addiction concurrently.

Unfortunately, many health practitioners and therapists believe that if you heal the underlying trauma, the addiction will also naturally decrease, but as stated, the addiction also needs to be addressed. If you don't like 12-step groups there are effective variations like SMART recovery, Moderation Management, and Dharma Recovery (previously called Refuge Recovery) that can work too.

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is known as a gold-standard in psychotherapy in many contexts, or a variety of mental health issues. While it's unequivocally useful in many contexts, it can fall flat in treating addiction and arguably trauma as well. This is because certain variations of CBT may neglect the physiological storage of trauma. Those struggling with trauma and addiction are often disconnected from their bodies, its cues, its needs, its signals, especially its respective trauma and addiction triggers. EMDR therapy in tandem with addiction support may work more effectively and get to the true root of the problem (the unhealed wounds and psychological trauma). The sooner we understand this, the more likely we are to heal the global pandemic of trauma and addiction.

Author: Jason Linder, MA, LMFT,

Click here to learn more about the Author: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/experts/jason-n-linder-psyd

The Power of Journaling

Sat, 14 Nov 2020 15:42:04 GMT

Can journaling help us cope during troubling times?

The six months since the World Health Organization declared COVID-19 a pandemic have been harrowing ones, to say the least. Against the backdrop of the disease and the economic impact it has brought, the world has witnessed ongoing racial injustice, natural disasters, and widespread wildfires, among other painful events.

For many people, it has been hard to stay emotionally afloat. Even the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has published guidelines regarding how to cope, with suggestions running the gamut from engaging in leisure activities and taking media breaks to getting sufficient sleep and eating right. This article adds one additional idea to that list: journaling.

There’s a one-in-two chance you’ve kept a journal. Perhaps you needed an outlet for your thoughts, or maybe you were recording your experiences to revisit later in life. According to surveys, about half of us have written in a journal at some point in our lives, and somewhere in the neighborhood of 1 in 6 people are active journalers right now. The number may be even higher for kids, with a 2014 survey showing that 21 percent of children and young people write in a diary at least once a month.

But considering the current need for additional coping practices, maybe more of us should.

Over the past couple of decades, dozens of studies have shown that certain journaling practices can positively impact a variety of outcomes, including happiness, goal attainment, and even some aspects of physical health. This research is often challenging to locate, given that the word “journaling” is not often used by investigators. Instead, they may label their interventions with names like “setting implementation intentions” or “engaging in expressive writing.”

Some of the effects of journaling are well-known. Most of us know, for instance, that keeping a gratitude journal can improve mood, an idea that first gained traction in a seminal paper published in 2003 by Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.

Although versions of this practice differ slightly, the basic idea is to write down a few good things that occur every day for anywhere from 2 to 10 weeks. They can be big things like “I just got a new job” or small things we might normally overlook, like “The flowers in the back yard were blooming today.” Given the turmoil in our world, it’s easy to overlook the little things that fill us with gratitude, instead focusing exclusively on the many negatives around us. Journaling may be a way of “hacking into” the brain, helping us be more mindful of the positive.

But the effects of journaling can also be more dramatic. In a 2013 study published in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine, researchers found that a certain kind of journaling—sometimes known as expressive writing—may help in healing physical wounds, at least small ones. Investigators asked healthy adults ages 64 to 97 to journal for 20 minutes a day, three days in a row. But not everybody used the same journaling practice: Half were encouraged to write about things that upset them, honestly discussing their thoughts and feelings about those events. The other half wrote about a much dryer topic: how they manage time during the day.

Two weeks later, all participants had a tiny biopsy performed on their arms, creating a small wound. Researchers then tracked how that wound healed by taking a picture every day. By day 11, a full 76 percent of the group who wrote the more genuine journal about upsetting life events had healed, compared to just 42 percent of those that wrote about time management.

Something important to notice about this research is that not all journaling is equal. There’s little evidence that simply spilling our minds out onto a blank page does any good. In the study just mentioned, all the participants kept journals, but the effects were different depending on the particular journaling practices they employed. In other words, what we write about and how we write about it seem to matter.

So, if you’re considering a writing practice, how should you begin? Like many things in life, it’s a personal choice, and it depends on what you feel would be the most helpful. However, a good place to start might be with a gratitude journal. Although writing about what we’re thankful for may not bring about dramatic changes in our lives, research consistently shows that it helps. Nobody’s pretending that keeping a journal will magically solve the many problems in our world. But during these troubling times, every little bit counts.

About the Author: David B. Feldman, Ph.D., is a professor in the department of counseling psychology at Santa Clara University.

Click here for more on the Author: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/experts/david-b-feldman-phd

Art Therapy Isn't Just for Kids: How it can help you

Tue, 03 Nov 2020 16:00:12 GMT

Art Therapy

Have you ever caught yourself doodling during a work meeting and realized it actually made you feel calmer? As it turns out, creativity actually has healing powers.

That’s why there’s a whole profession dedicated to using art to help with mental health. It’s called art therapy, and while it’s been around for a while, it’s been growing in popularity.

Margaret Carlock-Russo, president of the American Art Therapy Association and associate professor and program coordinator, expressive arts therapy at Prescott College, told TMRW that, especially in stressful times, people naturally turn to art when they’re seeking relief.

For example, people have been creating murals and artwork for the protests surrounding racial justice. “That, to me, speaks to the deep human need to express ourselves,” Carlock-Russo said.

What is art therapy?

Just as you might see a psychologist or traditional therapist, art therapy requires working with a licensed or registered professional with training. It pairs the creative process (drawing, collaging, etc.) with psychological theory and human experience to help individuals address concerns, emotions and different situations that might be concerning to them.

“Any time a person would think about going to see a counselor or therapist, they can also consider seeing an art therapist,” Carlock-Russo said. “One of the big misnomers is that because it has art in the title, a lot of people sometimes automatically think, ‘Oh, that’s for kids,’ but that’s not the case at all. It is for children, but it’s not only for children.”

What happens in art therapy?

You know how sometimes you have trouble putting how you’re feeling into words? That’s where the art comes in. It’s a way to express your emotions and feelings in a nonverbal way.

One thing art therapists want you to know is that you don’t have to be artistic to do this. “It’s not at all the same as when someone creates a fine art piece or wants to learn how to draw or paint,” she said. “This is about learning how to utilize media so that you can create lines, shapes, colors and symbols and reflect what you’re feeling inside, and that can come out spontaneously.”

For example, how are you engaging with the media? How are you creating lines and shapes? What colors are you choosing? “We don’t analyze (the client’s art) but we use that information to help them understand what they’re experiencing at the moment.”

How can I do art therapy activities at home?

If you’re feeling anxious or sad, there are some creative projects you can do at home to help give your mental health a boost and release some tension. Carlock-Russo offered some ideas that aren’t officially art therapy (since that requires working with a professional), but are great for self-help and wellness.

This doesn't take the place of seeing an actual art therapist if you think you need more help. “If a person is struggling with deeper emotions and things they can’t seem to grapple with or handle on their own, I absolutely advocate for them to seek help from a professional,” Carlock-Russo advised.

1. Create a collage

A collage can be made out of photos, images from magazines or even just construction paper.Carol Yepes / Getty Images

Perhaps you’re familiar with collaging from your teenage years, where your bedroom walls and school notebooks were covered with pictures of you and your friends, concert tickets and anything else that had meaning to you. Well, it turns out collaging can also be good for your mental health.

Grab some old magazines and cut out some pictures from it, then glue them together on a piece of paper in a new way that expresses an idea inside of you or a feeling you want to relieve, Carlock-Russo suggested. “You can also do a collage with just colored paper and just make it about shapes and lines and colors and not images,” she said.

2. Draw a picture of your favorite place

You know how looking at pictures from a favorite vacation can make you feel happy? Well, going through the action of drawing a place that makes you feel comfortable, relaxed and calm can bring back all of those feelings again, plus it can help calm you in the moment, Carlock-Russo suggested.

3. Make affirmation cards

Inspirational quotes can lift your mood (Hoda Kotb knows all about that!). Carlock-Russo suggests writing or printing out some of your favorites and gluing them on the numbered sides of a deck of playing cards. “It could be something even as simple as ‘Breathe’ or ‘Take a moment,'” she said. You can hang up a few around the house, pull a new one out every morning to focus on a positive thought or even keep one in your pocket during the day and look at it when you need a little moment of balance.

4. Doodle

Doodling can distract you and help clear your head.

If you’re feeling stressed, doodling can actually help you relax by distracting you while keeping your attention centered. Carlock-Russo suggests pairing it with movement (like drawing on a big white board or chalkboard), which can also help you release some tension and energy.

“You don’t need to think about (the doodle) a lot,” she said, adding you should just relax your brain and let it go. “You’re releasing all of those thoughts that are nagging at you,” she said.

Author: Julie Pennell

Link: https://www.today.com/tmrw/art-therapy-adults-activities-help-you-destress-today-t195045#anchor-Whathappensinarttherapy

Exercise and Your Brain

Thu, 24 Sep 2020 15:15:14 GMT

One Cardio Workout = Two Hours of Supercharged Brainpower

The link between regular aerobic exercise, better brain functioning, and slower cognitive decline as we age is well established. But how does a single cardio workout affect attention, concentration, learning, and memory functions from hour-to-hour as we go about our daily lives?

Anecdotally, from a meta-cognitive perspective, when I "think about my thinking" and how aerobic exercise affects how my brain works, I realized many years ago that my thinking is at its best during the window of time just after completing some moderate-to-vigorous physical activity (MVPA).

Because exercise helps me think better, my daily writing routine almost always involves crafting a bleary-eyed rough draft in the predawn hours while sipping coffee, taking a computer break to go for an hour-long jog at sunrise, and then spending about another two hours of "supercharged brainpower" time polishing a final draft while my thinking is crystal clear, and there's no brain fog.

If my brain were a light bulb, it gets amped-up with mega-wattage just after a morning workout and gets dimmer* as the day turns to night; after dusk, my low-powered mind can't handle much heavy lifting.

Is there a downside to thinking noticeably faster and better after a workout? Yes. If for some reason, I'm unable to spend my most laser-focused time of day finishing a polished draft immediately after a workout, the same mental workload that takes less than two hours of superfluid, lightning-fast thinking to complete after a jog can take over four hours of laborious, low-wattage cognitive functioning later in the day—when my post-workout, turbocharged surge of brainpower has fizzled out.

Apparently, a growing body of empirical evidence suggests that I'm not alone when it comes to experiencing better brain function in the 120 minutes or so after completing a cardio workout.

A recent systematic review of "the effects of a single exercise workout on memory and learning functions" by Peter Blomstrand and Jan Engvall concludes that "aerobic exercise for two minutes to one hour at moderate-to-high intensity improved attention, concentration, and learning and memory functions for up to two hours." These findings (Blomstrand & Engvall, 2020) were published on August 8 in the Translational Sports Medicine journal.

This systematic review of over a dozen different studies also shows that "aerobic exercise improves the learning ability and storage in memory when exercise is performed before and in close connection with the learning activity."

In a press release about this systematic review, Dr. Blomstrand, M.D., Ph.D., of County Hospital Ryhov and Jönköping University in Sweden summed up his findings in four words: "Exercise makes you smart."

Blomstrand and Engvall's systematic review is rooted in a two-pronged research question: (1) How long should a single "brain-boosting" bout of aerobic exercise last?; (2) What intensity of cardiorespiratory exertion has the most beneficial effects on learning and memory functions?

Altogether, the 13 studies cited in this systematic review involved 1,067 young adults (18 to 35 years of age) who participated in 2-to-60 minutes of moderate-to-vigorous walking, running, or bicycling before performing cognitive tests that measured "attention, concentration, working memory, short‐term memory, long‐term memory, verbal fluency, or the capability to plan and solve problems."

After a detailed analysis of all the data from each study, Blomstrand and Engvall concluded:

"This systematic review strongly suggests that aerobic, physical exercise followed by a brief recovery before encoding improves attention, concentration, learning, and memory functions in young adults. The results of this review may have important education‐related implications."

Why does a single bout of aerobic exercise improve cognitive functions for up to two hours? Several mechanisms might explain why acute exercise improves learning and memory functions immediately after a workout.

Although these findings are correlative, the authors speculate that the cognitive improvements from an acute bout of exercise may be caused by things like exercise‐induced long‐term potentiation (LTP), plasticity‐related proteins that tag nearby synapses, increasing expression of dopamine along with enhanced attention and memory encoding through modulation of dopamine transmitters.

Blomstrand and Engvall also speculate that exercise-induced increases of cAMP‐responsive element-binding protein‐1 (CREB‐1) and brain‐derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF) may promote better cognitive functioning. That said, the authors conclude: "In summary, several mechanisms have been suggested, but more research is needed to understand how morphological, neurochemical, and electrophysiological alterations in various regions interact."

Article Written By Christopher Bergland

About the author: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/experts/christopher-bergland

How Addiction Affects the Family

Tue, 15 Sep 2020 20:42:07 GMT

The Many Ways Addiction Affects The Family

Battling a substance use disorder is viewed by many as a personal experience. Because harmful substances have devastating effects on the user, many may not take into consideration other people directly involved—how addiction affects the family. Spouses, children, and parents who witness a family member struggling with addiction experience emotional damage, as well as financial, legal, medical, and other consequences.

The effects of drug and alcohol addiction can be both short-term and long-term. Peaceful, loving homes can be divided by the strain caused by drug and alcohol abuse. Conflict becomes normal as family members fight to engage in a son or daughter who abuses heroin, for example. Trust begins to erode. Relatives may become more guarded if a relative abusing illicit substances acts with aggression or hides their disorder in secrecy. Marriages can end due to changes caused by addiction. Communication becomes more difficult, highlighting frustration.

Family members see their relative endure side effects of drugs or fly into rages when under the influence of alcohol. Others may see their relatives lose weight rapidly, becoming unrecognizable. Some may not hear from a loved one for an extended period of time, only to discover they are living on the street or have fatally overdosed. Such shock can cause a relative to endure severe trauma or develop unhealthy coping mechanisms like codependent behaviors in response.

How Addiction Impacts Young Children

According to Psychology Today, 1 in 5 children grow up in a home where a parent abuses drugs or alcohol. Witnessing the trauma of a parent suffering addiction at a young age has long-term effects on the child. Children growing up seeing a parent addicted to drugs or alcohol are more likely to develop substance use disorders in their adulthood. They are also 3 times more likely being neglected, physically, and sexually abused. Seeing a parent on drugs often creates distressing emotions which not only create delays in learning and development, but pronged mental and emotional disorders.

Since children are still developing their personalities and are vulnerable to external influences, they run the risk of repeating such behaviors. Children may be exposed to aggression or violent behavior due to a parent or both parent’s drug use. Arguments between parents may be normal, causing the child emotional distress as they witness family members fighting.

Early exposure to a home divided by drug use can cause the child to feel emotionally and physically neglected and unsafe. As a result, they can become more mentally and emotionally unstable. Children may develop extreme guilt and self-blame for a parent’s substance abuse. They may develop feelings of unworthiness for disturbances around the home or develop dysfunctional attachments in their adulthood. In extreme cases, children can be removed from the home and placed in foster care.

Teenage Addiction Affects the Family

The CDC reports underaged drinkers have more drinks per drinking occasion than their adult counterparts. At least 19% of individuals between 12 to 20 years old drink alcohol regularly, but due to underreporting the figure is most likely much higher. Marijuana use is more common in teens than cigarette smoking and other drug use. Teenagers deal with peer pressure in school and are also constantly bombarded with temptation for trying new or dangerous drugs.

Many are still impressionable while forming their identity. Additionally, teens who have experienced parental substance abuse are more likely to abuse substances in adulthood. Much of the cause of teenage addiction can stem from external (peer pressure in school) and internal factors (genetics and self-medication).

Substances like cocaine can over-stimulate teens, causing to them sleep less and perform poorly in school or hang out with friends who abuse substances. Prescription opioids and synthetic opioids may produce euphoric effects, but consequently require frequent use with damaging side effects.

These causes have direct impact on family dynamics such as:

Side effects

Withdrawal

Strained relationships

Financial hardships

Poor school performance

Exposure to other drugs

Reckless behavior within the home

Stealing money from parents to support their habit

Running away from home

Causing parental grief

Teens can become overwhelmed by addictive substances and strained relationships at home and may want to run away from home. Parental distress can seemingly push troubled teens into the arms of a substance to “escape”. Above all, once a teen runs away from home, they are vulnerable to sexual, economical, and emotional exploitation.

College Addiction Affects the Family

Teens who abuse substances are more likely to continue their substance use disorders into college. Once teens have an early exposure to drugs, they often form a tolerance and addiction in their college years. Many will continue to “party” and indulge in illicit substances, consequently finding it difficult to slow down. College campuses report high numbers of sexual assaults, property damage, and aggression directly linked to alcohol abuse. Signs of substance abuse impacting college students include:

Mood swings

Creating conflict and irritability

Creating anxiety in parents’ minds

Lowered inhibitions

Inability to handle college commitments

Re-establishing Connections

Substance abuse disorders can take a toll on family members and the individual struggling with addition. Luckily, there is help available. Treatment providers can guide family members to the best treatment facility focusing on their relative’s healing needs. Various facilities allow sober relatives to visit family members in rehab to receive counseling and maintain relationships. Patients can heal with therapy options, medication and professional support.

Article Retrieved from https://www.addictioncenter.com/addiction/how-addiction-affects-the-family/

Mindfulness is Essential for Healthy Relationships

Sat, 22 Aug 2020 14:36:59 GMT

The Power of Showing our Real Feelings

Being human means having a longing to connect with others. Intimacy is the felt sense of connection with another person. The important question is this: What does it take to experience warm, safe, and fulfilling connections in our lives?

Some people are attracted to each other based upon an image that's being projected, such as being “successful,” beautiful, or interesting. But this superficial attraction doesn't offer the intimacy we desire. Such attractions are short-lived at best. They are destined to curdle into distance and dissatisfaction when people inevitably discover who we really are, including the secret fears, hurts, and challenges we conceal. If we’re not moving toward a rich and alive intimacy based upon a deeper sharing of our innermost lives, we might become rather boring to others--and bored with ourselves.

Rather than strive to be someone who we think people will like, we need to discover what it means to be ourselves. A path toward genuine intimacy begins by allowing ourselves to be seen as we really are. Staying connected to the energy of our own being—resting comfortably in ourselves--creates a foundation for people to come toward us.

Intimacy happens as we show who we really are. Showing who we are requires knowing who we are. This means pausing, looking inside, and being connected to the ever-changing inner world of our feelings and preferences.

We can’t expect others to feel drawn toward us if we’re not willing to take the risk to be vulnerable and reveal the ever-changing textures of our inner world.

Being Mindful of Our Feelings

We often run on automatic pilot—not slowing down enough to look inside and discover what we’re really feeling. As we’re getting to know someone as a potential friend or partner—or perhaps even with our partner or good friend, we might be afraid to share feelings that might be uncomfortable or threatening. We might be afraid of rejection or being seen as weak or pitiful. Yet if we want close, trusting relationships, we need to know and show what’s going on inside us.

Mindfulness-based practices have become popular these days—and for good reason. Yet teachers of mindfulness and meditation often miss something important—being mindful of our life of feelings. “Spiritual bypassing” is a term that has gained popularity, which refers to a tendency to strive for spiritual growth in a way that circumvents our authentic, though oftentimes uncomfortable, feelings and needs.

Mindfulness is limited if it doesn't include bringing awareness to our inner life of feelings, such as sadness, hurt, shame, anger, fear, or delight. Mindfulness can be applied to our primary, authentic desires, such as when we need a hug or need to talk. It's important to know when we feel hurt by a partner’s or friend’s comment so that we don’t allow the relationship to decay due to neglect, false pride, or fear.

Feelings and desires are the way life speaks to us. Sharing our feelings and needs is an essential way to know each other more intimately. If we keep our emotions and wants hidden, we don't give people a chance to know us and feel closer to us. We can’t expect intimacy to blossom if we’re not willing to allow ourselves to be seen as we are, which sometimes means allowing ourselves to be vulnerable or a bit awkward.

This isn’t to suggest that we recklessly express every feeling we notice, regardless of the consequences or a person’s capacity to hear us. We need boundaries and a felt sense of when it feels relatively safe and “right” to share our precious feelings with another person.

Staying Isolated

We often keep our feelings hidden from ourselves, fearful that they might overwhelm us or get us into some kind of trouble. Staying hidden keeps us isolated. Emotional intelligence includes the capacity to identify and manage our emotional life and offer empathy toward others. If we want to be happy in our relationships, we need to enter our world of feelings in an intelligent, mindful way — and then reveal those feelings to people we want to connect with.

Mindfulness of feelings is one of the four foundations of mindfulness in Buddhist Psychology, If we want to live as a conscious, awake person, we need to find ways to access our felt experience.

I’ve found focusing to be a useful complement to meditation. It is a kind of mindfulness practice that provides a helpful structure for helping us go inside and be with our experience just as it is, without judging ourselves—and listen to the wisdom of our feelings.

If we want more intimate, richer relationships, we need to take intelligent risks to share our authentic feelings with people we want to feel close to, as well as listen empathically when others share their feelings. We need to listen closely to the tender feelings that we might normally bypass.

We need to practice being gentle and accepting toward our feelings. Then, even if they are not well received, we are there for ourselves.

Our only real power is to honor and validate our authentic self even if others don’t respond positively. But if we can find the courage to risk revealing our authentic experience, we might find that others appreciate, respect, and like us even more.

Written By John Amodeo Ph.D., MFT For more on the Author click here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/experts/john-amodeo-phd-mft

Living A Healthy Life

Sun, 16 Aug 2020 16:32:45 GMT

Health

Living a healthy life means making lifestyle choices that support one's physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional well-being. Managing your health can be challenging at times; when one facet of wellness demands more attention than others, you may end up struggling to maintain a good balance. But to remain of sound body, mind, and spirit, it’s important to pay attention to all aspects of health: Your mental, emotional, and spiritual sides all play a role in your overall welfare.

Optimal Well-Being

A state of optimal well-being means more than just the absence of disease or disorder; it also means having the resources to cope with problems and circumstances beyond your control and to recover from difficult or troubling situations. Actively focusing on this intersection between health and behavior can help prevent, or at least delay, illness and disease, and steer people to make better decisions about their well-being.

How do you maintain optimal health?

Your good health relies on you making it a priority. In addition to eating healthfully, exercising, and sleeping well, you need to be responsible for yourself, manage your time, stay organized, look out for your future self, stay connected, and live life with meaning, passion, and purpose.

Why is mental health important for overall well-being?

Being of sound mind helps your overall health. This entails how we handle everyday stress, make decisions, maintain our relationships, as well as how we manage our moods and emotions. It also helps to be engaged, creative, and productive.

The Importance of Self-Care

Self-care is not about being selfish; everyone must care for and maintain their bodies and minds for optimal well-being. However, one person’s approach to self-care may not work for another. While some priorities are universal, such as eating a well-balanced diet, others are not, and each individual must custom-design a plan fitting their lifestyle, one that will deliver benefits. Some people require less sleep, while others require more. And some people devote themselves to the practice of meditation, while others put in time at the gym.

What is self-care?

Caring for yourself seems like a no-brainer: Eating right, staying active, and sleeping well don’t sound hard, yet many people fail miserably. Self-care starts with a healthy relationship with yourself. It takes effort but it’s required to maintain overall well-being.

Why is physical activity so important for your health?

Exercise has a positive impact on the body’s growth and repair; the body can be in a continual state of renewal. Without regular physical activity, a person’s muscles can waste away, hindering movement, then affecting overall health and leading to decline and decay.

Article Retrieved: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/health

The Difference Between Sadness and Depression

Tue, 21 Jul 2020 16:03:40 GMT

Sadness and/or Depression- The inability to distinguish them could lead us to react inappropriately.

We often hear the term “depression” thrown around lightly in conversation. We may come home from a stressful day at work and tell our family at dinner that we are depressed. We may have received some bad news about a loved one and tell ourselves that we are depressed. And sure, we may be depressed, but often we are confusing sadness with depression. Sadness is a symptom of depression, and because we associate these together, we often struggle to differentiate between these two common psychological states.

This creates a significant problem.

The inability to differentiate between sadness and depression can lead us to neglect a severe psychological condition (depression) and overreact to a normal emotional state (sadness). If we overuse the term depression when we are describing our emotional state of sadness, we are simplifying a major mental health disorder. Depression is a serious mental health disorder that has vast implications on our personal lives, professional lives, and society as a whole. As of 2017, 300 million people around the world have depression.

What is sadness?

Sadness is a normal emotion that is triggered by a specific adverse event or bad experience. In other words, we become sad about something specific. This emotional state dissipates after some time or after something good, replaces the hurtful event that triggered the initial sadness. Sadness is temporary. We may feel sad for a moment, an hour, or even a couple of days. Every individual will experience sadness, probably more than once, in his/her lifetime. You may become sad because you ended a romantic relationship, or you did not do well on an exam, or you spent the night fighting with a friend. We can often find some relief from our sadness by crying, venting, or talking about our situation.

What is depression?

Depression is a mental health disorder, an abnormal mental and emotional state, which affects how we think and feel about everything. Depression leaks into every aspect of our life, and when we are depressed, we feel numb or sad about everything. Everything in our life is less enjoyable, less interesting, and less important. The things we once loved and were passionate about no longer bring us meaning or purpose. Depression, unlike sadness, does not have to have a specific underlying trigger. Individuals are often depressed “for no specific reason.” On the surface, they may seem like they have their life together. A great job, a loving family, a beautiful home, but in reality, they are hiding their emotions behind a mask. They may be barely able to get out of bed in the morning. They may be struggling with their relationships. They may be lonely. They may no longer find satisfaction or purpose in their job. Depression makes us less patient and quick to anger. Unfortunately, many individuals assume that one can snap out of their depression. They misinterpret that depression is not a choice or a state of mind. Depression is a mental illness.

Signs and symptoms of depression

To be formally diagnosed with major depressive disorder (MDD) an individual must experience a depressed mood or loss of interest or pleasure in almost all activities for at least two weeks as well as at least five other symptoms including the following:

Change in sleep: Either difficulty falling asleep or sleeping too much)

A decrease in energy or feelings of fatigue daily

Change in appetite or weight: Gaining weight, losing weight, overeating or eating much less

Feelings of guilt or worthlessness

Difficulty concentrating

Slow physical movements or unintentional purposeless movements that are noticeable by others

Recurrent thoughts of suicide

Sadness (depressed mood) is just one symptom of depression.

Treating sadness versus treating depression

Sadness can be overcome within time. You can express your emotions, “cry it out”, go out with friends, or spend time outdoors. Expressing sadness over the loss of a loved one may take some time, but you can still find happiness in other aspects of your life. Engage yourself more with these happy aspects.

Depression is best treated with a combination of medications and psychotherapy. The most common medications used to treat depression are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). All medications, including SSRIs, come with side effects, and therefore it is essential to have a conversation with your healthcare professional before starting this treatment. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is the mainstay psychotherapy approach in treating depression. Treatment for depression does not happen overnight; this is a process and can take some time, and different treatment approaches. Depression is a prevalent mental illness, and many treatments benefit most individuals.

Author: Kristen Fuller, M.D., is a physician and a clinical mental health writer for Center For Discovery.

Click Here to Learn more about the Author: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/experts/kristen-fuller-md

How Stress Changes Your Brain

Fri, 03 Jul 2020 15:24:16 GMT

Stress Hormones Have a Profound Effect on the Body and Brain

People are constantly exposed to stressful situations. These may be physical, like participating in marathons or developing an illness. But stress can also be mental, wherein we become anxious and worried over certain events, existing or anticipated.

Whether physical or mental, stress activates a brain network involving most directly the hypothalamus, the pituitary gland, and the adrenal cortex to release stress hormones. Such hormones include several cortisone-like compounds called glucocorticoids, and the most prominent one in humans is cortisol.

Glucocorticoids have profound effects on both the body and brain. Regulation of glucocorticoids is accomplished by the brain, and learning experiences have profound effects on this control system. Most of what was initially known about glucocorticoids was their effect on the body. I had the great thrill of visiting the pioneer in this field, Hans Selye in his laboratory complex at the University of Montreal.

Effects on the Body

Selye’s research led him to formulate the widely accepted concept of the glucocorticoid system as accounting for a “General Adaptation Syndrome,” which basically explained how the brain and body respond to stress. He discovered that glucocorticoids are “Goldilocks” compounds. That is, a little doesn’t do much, a lot is damaging, and intermediate levels are “just right.”

A moderate amount of cortisol is what is normally released every morning before you awaken. By the way, this is the reason surgeons want to operate early in the morning. This release helps prepare the body for the day’s activities by mobilizing blood glucose, typically by breaking down fat and, if needed, protein stores. Glucose is especially important for the brain, which has huge demands for energy, and which can only burn glucose for energy. Neurons are energized and memory ability is enhanced. Another useful thing cortisol does is to reduce the release of cellular chemicals that cause inflammation.

However, the hormone also inhibits systems that channel resources for growth and reproduction, impairs bone formation, and inhibits the immune system. These problems are why glucocorticoid prescriptions usually start off with a high dose to the blood level up quickly and then the dose is tapered to zero after about four days.

The rub comes when stress is prolonged. Selye discovered that the beneficial adaptation to temporary stress cannot be sustained in chronic stress. The system becomes exhausted and control breaks down. Under chronic stress, body muscle mass decreases because the system has been breaking down proteins in order to generate energy. Inflammation bathes cells in toxic chemicals. Infections increase because the immune system has been compromised. In obese people, glucocorticoid levels cumulatively increase in fat cells, increase fat deposits still further, and increase the likelihood of type 2 diabetes and cardiovascular disease.

Effects on the Brain

In the case of the brain, persistently high levels of glucocorticoid often cause depression. Memory ability is impaired. Brain degeneration and cognitive decline accelerate. Many neurons are actually killed. What I want to stress here is that chronic high levels of cortisone change the neural circuitry that regulates its release. In other words, the brain learns a new way of functioning when constantly bathed in high levels of cortisone.

Effects of Learning

Few people make the connection between glucocorticoid control and learning. The neuronal circuits that control hormone secretion learn from stressful experiences, just as all neurons learn from whatever they experience. What neurons in the cortisol control circuit learn in chronic stress is that the usual controls can’t work anymore.

A typical response to repeated stress of a certain type (for example, constant quarrels with a spouse or repeated job failures) can be habituation. It’s like “tuning out.” Repeated exposure to the same stress teaches the neurons to stop responding as much as usual. Thus, there is less of the benefits that glucocorticoids provide.

At the same time, the hormone control system becomes hypersensitive to other stresses, especially unpredictable or especially severe stresses. The control system learns to overreact to everything other than the stress to which it has habituated. Now, the damaging effect of too much glucocorticoid becomes pervasive, both for the body and brain.

Whether the brain learns stress-coping strategies depends on the conscious override of hyperactive responses to stress, because the neural system that operates our emotions, the limbic system, also regulates the glucocorticoid control system. We can not only reduce excessive glucocorticoid but also teach our brain better ways to deal with stress by doing the following:

-Simplify and organize our life

-Do one thing at a time and finish it

-Find pleasure in the little things

-Learn to have a more positive attitude

-Laugh and be happy

-Suppress anxiety

-Be more rational

-Develop supportive social relations

-Reduce exposure to stressors

Excessive stress is a special problem in children. First, growing up is usually stressful, because of school and complex social experiences. Children are just beginning life's journey of learning how to cope with stress. For that reason, I produced a YouTube video to help school children learn about stress and how to deal with it.

About the Author:

William Klemm, Ph.D., is a senior professor of Neuroscience at Texas A&M University.

Online: Improve Learning and Memory, LinkedIn

To learn more on the author click here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/experts/william-r-klemm-phd

References:

Herman, James P. (2013). Neural control of chronic stress adaptation. Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience. August 8. Doi: 10.3389/fnbeh.2013.00061

Vogelzangs, N. et al. (2009). Late-life depression, cortisol, and the metabolic syndrome. Am. J. Geriatr. Psychiatry.17(8): 716-21. doi: 10.1097/JGP.0b013e3181aad5d7.

How Reopening the Country Might Be Affecting Your Mental Health

Wed, 17 Jun 2020 22:44:55 GMT

Coronavirus anxieties may linger, even if the worst is over.

Key Takeaways

As the economy reopens and states begin lifting stay-at-home orders, we need to mentally prepare for a new normal.

Practice caution when adding socialization and other pre-COVID-19 behaviors back into your life.

Don’t hesitate to seek professional help if the stress of reopening is negatively affecting your mental health.

If you’re anxious, worried, or concerned about life after the coronavirus pandemic, you’re not alone. As we emerge from our homes to resume work, shopping, dining out, exercise, and daily life, many of us are scrutinizing routine decisions we once thought nothing of -- not to mention, we’re also facing the reality that our health and financial well-being is much different now than it was going into quarantine.

Plus, there is still a lot we don't know. Like how safe is it to resume daily life without a vaccine? And how should we feel about states being on different timelines? Even as things open up, there are still complicated feelings and thoughts about being around other people.

We talked with five mental health experts about the psychology of opening back up and how we can adapt to the new normal.

How to Cope With Anxiety About Coronavirus (COVID-19)

How To Manage Re-Entry Anxiety

There’s no denying that COVID-19 has impacted our mental health. But now, as we begin the process of restarting our lives and the economy, many people are balancing the need to socialize and regain some kind of normalcy with the lingering dangers of being in crowded spaces and potentially risking exposure to the virus. Experts are calling this crossroads of emotions “re-entry anxiety.”

One of the top concerns is how to deal with the stress and anxiety that people around you might be infected or contagious, which also extends to feeling awkward when near strangers.

To help ease some of this fear anxiety, the first thing experts recommend is that you only do what's comfortable for you and go at your own pace.

“We have to think about this as a long-term strategy, over months or probably a year or so,” says Kevin Gilliland, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and the executive director of Innovation 360. Take your time through the process and don't let anyone make you feel like you have to be comfortable going back to normal right away.

Besides going at your own pace, a good place to start says Gilliland is to focus on the things you actually have control over,1 like your behavior in relation to the virus, since it’s the best strategy when we have uncertainty. This includes being factual and specific with your thoughts because worry hates that.

"We have no idea who is infected and who isn’t, so we still need to social distance, wash our hands frequently, sanitize surfaces at home and work regularly, and be mindful of how much and how many articles and news stories we are watching and reading,” he explains.

From there, we can continue to do things to maintain a strong immune system like being physically active, getting seven or eight hours of sleep, and connecting with two or three people that know you well.

As for the need to socialize, Gilliland says we desperately need to get this back in our lives, but we need to be mindful of distance and touch. Start with a small circle of close friends and get together outside in a park or yard or trail. Walk and talk and share about life and be careful that it’s not all about this virus.

Also, be aware of the people you surround yourself with. Are there people you talk to that increase your anxiety or decrease your anxiety about this issue? “More is not always better when it comes to anxiety,” says Gilliland.

How the Coronavirus Pandemic Is Affecting Mental Health, According to Therapists

Why Seeing People In Masks Is Contributing to Re-Entry Anxiety

For many people, walking around in a mask surrounded by others wearing masks provokes feelings of fear and uncertainty.

“People feel anxiety and fear when wearing a mask or seeing others wear masks because it is a visual and constant reminder of the threat we are under,” says Moe Gelbart, Ph.D., director of practice development at Community Psychiatry. The mask symbolizes the virus which lurks out there and ignites fears of lack of control and of an unseen enemy.

Many people are also struggling with face coverings because they prevent us from seeing each other. “Seeing faces is a very important aspect of our socialization,” says Allie Shapiro, M.D., a psychiatrist with Community Psychiatry. Not seeing faces, she says, removes that familiarity and connection.

Wearing or seeing someone wear a mask reminds us of the greater issue, which, Cynthia Catchings, LCSW-S, Talkspace therapist says our minds often react to immediately. “We can go into fight or flight mode, and living in this constant state of hyper-arousal affects us physically, mentally, and emotionally,” she adds. To minimize the effects of this hyper-arousal, Catchings recommends the following strategies:

Practice mindfulness, deep breathing, or meditation

Stick to regular bedtime and waking times

Exercise during the day

Don’t be afraid to use crying as a release since it may help to cope with anger

Talk to an empathetic friend, family member, or therapist

Journal or engage in creative art

Practice deep breathing

Use creative visioning and imagine yourself safe and healthy

If you experience increased anxiety while walking around in a mask, Shapiro says to pause where you are and try taking a few deep breaths.2 It’s also a good idea to remind yourself why you’ve gone outside and remember that you are doing the best you can to keep yourself safe.

Gelbart suggests that people remind themselves that things like hand washing, social distancing, and wearing a mask — all of which provide some measure of control and makes the unknowable known — reduces fear and anxiety. It’s also beneficial to remind yourself that wearing a mask is an act of kindness and care for others.

The 13 Best Face Masks for You and Your Family

Balancing the Need for Normalcy While Feeling Unsafe

As different parts of the country open up at their own speed, Shapiro says it’s important to realize that acting, feeling, and being normal is going to look different now. Even in places that are now open, or were never closed, to begin with, things look and feel different. “Knowing you have full control to keep yourself safe, can make accepting the change easier,” she says.

After all, it’s not the crowded space that is the source of danger, it’s the virus.

“Wearing protective gear, like a mask, and staying vigilant, as we are now accustomed to doing, drastically reduces the risk of infection,” adds Shapiro.

Additionally, Dayry Hulkow, primary therapist at Arete Recovery, a Delphi Behavioral Health Group, recommends exercising prudence while tending to our emotional and social needs in a responsible manner. “We can evaluate the necessity or benefits compared to the risks associated with specific places and situations,” she says.

For example, the necessity for grocery shopping may take precedence for most of us despite the risks. Also, getting a hair cut or going to the gym may outweigh the risks for many of us, whereas other more crowded spaces may pose increased risks which, Hulkow says wouldn’t seem worth it for some of us regardless of the potential benefits.

And Gelbart agrees. “Our behaviors are risk-reward based, and each of us has our own needs, and our own levels of risk we are willing to take and are justified in whatever our reaction and decision may be,” he says. We balance the need to get out with the fear we experience by how necessary the action is to us.

For example, going to a restaurant is really necessary for some, and for others, not important at all. He stresses the need to accept our own limits and boundaries and to resist the pressure of other people’s choices.

Why It’s Normal to Feel Scared

The news and social media paint a picture of people feeling pure joy and elation about being out of quarantine. But what if you have mixed emotions about re-entry? Is it normal to still feel scared?

Yes, says Hulkow. “After all we’ve seen in the news during the pandemic and experienced in real life, feeling scared, stressed, and anxious is 100 percent valid,” she explains. That said, Hulkow does stress the importance of working through these feelings and exploring ways of coping.

For some people, particularly those within vulnerable populations, continuing to stay home may be preferable for the time being. However, Hulkow points out that staying home solely out of fear may keep other people from living life in general, whether outside or inside the home. “While it may feel awkward or uncomfortable at first to venture out, it is possible for most of us to safely return to some sort of “normal” within a reasonable time.

“It’s not only normal to feel scared but very appropriate,” says Gelbart. “The more unknown something is, the less control we feel we have, and the more our feelings of anxiety and fear are spiked.” That’s why Gelbart says it’s important to know that we can listen to our feelings of fear, or we can act differently despite them. But most importantly, he says, we need to acknowledge and validate the feelings we experience as normal.

“It’s not unusual for some people to continue to be worried or avoid moving back into life,” says Gilliland. However, he does stress the need to be careful and not to allow worry to spill over into anxiety and fear, or our life may become very limited. And again, be factual. “Isolation is not good for humans, even when it’s the right thing medically. If we disconnect from others and from things that are beneficial in our life, our levels of anxiety, depression, and substance use increase,” says Gilliland.

Most importantly, Shapiro reminds us that no one has ever been through anything like this in the modern world, so no one really knows how to do it “right.”

Even the experts don’t have all the answers, so it’s normal to have your own uncertainties and doubts.

By Sara Lindberg, M.Ed

To learn more about the Author Click Here: https://www.verywellfit.com/sara-lindberg-4684058

Psychological Tricks To Help You Stop Worrying

Wed, 10 Jun 2020 20:51:31 GMT

Anxiety- How to Help Stop Worrying

Worrying stems from a desire to be in control. We often want to control our environment or the outcome of every situation.

But the more you try to control everything around you, the more anxious you’ll feel. It’s a vicious cycle to break: worry, try to gain control, fail, worry again, repeat.

Worrying about things you can’t control — like the state of the economy or someone else’s behavior — will drain you of the mental strength you need to be your best.

It can also lead to other toxic habits, like blaming yourself too much or micromanaging other people.

Fortunately, you don't have to resign yourself to being a lifelong "worry-wart." You can take control of your mind and train your brain to think differently.

Here are two things you can do the next time you catch yourself worrying about things you can't control:

1. Develop a realistic sense of control.

Identify what is within your control and what isn't. For example, you can control how eye-catching your marketing ads are, but you can’t control whether people buy your product.

Additionally, you can give your employees the tools they need to succeed, but you can’t force them to be productive.

When you strike a healthy balance of control, you’ll see that you can choose your own attitude and behavior, but you can’t control many external factors.

So when you’re faced with a problem or experiencing discomfort, ask yourself, “Is this a problem I can solve? Or do I need to change how I feel about the problem?”

If it’s within your control, tackle the problem. If it’s out of your control, focus on changing your emotional state. Use healthy coping skills, like engaging in a hobby or practicing meditation, to deal with the uncomfortable emotions that get stirred up when things are out of your control.

2. Schedule time to worry.

Most of the people who come into my therapy office looking for a solution on how to stop worrying want it fast and easy. But there isn’t a magic trick or special pill that will make you stop worrying right away.

There is a psychological trick, however, that can help you contain your worrying. The trick involves scheduling time to worry. It sounds ridiculous on the surface. But it really works. And there are studies to back it up.

Set aside 15 minutes each day to worry. Mark it on your calendar, or add it to your schedule. Make it consistent if you can. Think something like, "I'll worry from 7 to 7:15 p.m., every night." (You might not want to worry right before bedtime though. That might keep you up).

Whenever you catch yourself worrying outside of your time frame, remind yourself it's not time to worry and that you'll have plenty of time to think about those worries during your scheduled time.

Once you arrive at your worry time, then worry all you want. Sit and think about all the worries that are outside of your control. You can even write them down if you prefer.

Then, after 15 minutes have passed, tell yourself it's time to get back to your everyday life. Get up and go about your usual business. With consistent practice, research shows you’ll contain your worries to just 15 minutes a day. That’s a big improvement if you’re used to worrying 24/7.

Build Your Mental Muscle

Becoming mentally stronger requires you to have a balanced sense of control. After all, you can do a lot to increase your happiness and your chances of success, but you can’t control every factor around you — like the weather, the economy, or how other people behave.

When you stop worrying about things you can’t control, you’ll have more time and energy to devote to the things you do have control over. And this can be key to reaching your greatest potential.

Author: Click Herehttps://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/202006/psychological-tricks-help-you-stop-worrying

Amy Morin, LCSW, is a licensed clinical social worker, psychotherapist, and the author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do.

Benefits of Meditation for Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Fri, 05 Jun 2020 19:25:09 GMT

How Meditation Can Help Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Meditation, in its simplest terms, refers to learning how to pay attention. When used properly, meditation allows you to slow down and observe the world without judgment. If you live with generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), it can also help to reduce worrying thoughts and bring about a feeling of balance, calm and focus. For the 6.8 million Americans who live with chronic daily anxiety, meditation can offer a way to finally relax.

What Is Meditation?

Meditation has its roots in Buddhist philosophy. When you think of meditation, it probably conjures up images of a room full of people sitting cross-legged and chanting the same word repeatedly. Popularized by celebrities, transcendental meditation (TM) is one form of meditation that has the goal of helping you enter a deep state of relaxation or a state of restful alertness. Because meditation helps to reduce stress and fatigue, its helpfulness for those with generalized anxiety disorder—who suffer from chronic anxiety and often insomnia—is easy to comprehend.

How Meditation and Mindfulness Overlap

The concepts of meditation and mindfulness are very similar. While meditation typically involves trying to enter a different state of consciousness, mindfulness means becoming aware of the present moment. In this way, you might think of mindfulness as one step on the path toward meditation.Both of these practices may be helpful for reducing anxiety because they enable you to reduce worry and be aware without being fearful.

Mindfulness-Based Meditation

Meditation used in the treatment of anxiety disorders typically takes the form of mindfulness-based meditation. This type of meditation has its roots in the mindfulness movement started by Jon Kabat-Zinn, founder of the mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) approach.The basic premise of the mindfulness-based stress reduction approach is to learn to detach from anxious thoughts. This is achieved by practicing awareness, identifying tension in the body, understanding your thinking patterns, and learning how to deal with difficult emotions.MBSR is typically practiced with an instructor, but there are also online courses that you can take such as the free one offered by Palouse Mindfulness.

Research on Meditation and GAD

Research support for the benefits of meditation for generalized anxiety disorder has been positive. A 2013 randomized controlled trial was conducted with 93 individuals with DSM-IV diagnosed GAD comparing an 8-week manualized mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) group program with an attention control (stress management education, or SME). MBSR was associated with significantly greater reductions in anxiety for three of the four study measures. Participants also showed a greater increase in positive self-statements. Additionally, a 2012 meta-analysis indicated strong support for mindfulness meditation for anxiety.

How to Practice Meditation for GAD

If you're living with generalized anxiety, practicing daily meditation may help you to overcome anxiety and reduce tension in your body. You don't need a lot of time to meditate—initially, try to carve out a few minutes each day. You can gradually increase that time as you learn how to relax and what it feels like to be calm. If you've ever taken a yoga class, you are well on your way to practicing meditation.

Steps for Mindfulness Meditation

Below are easy steps to follow to get started today:

1. Sit upright in a chair, and place your feet flat on the floor.

2. Begin paying attention to your breath. Don't try to change how you are breathing; simply observe your body as you inhale and exhale.

3. You might feel compelled to shift your focus elsewhere. Resist this urge and continue to focus on your breathing.

4. Anxious thoughts may pass through your mind. Acknowledge them, but then bring yourself back to awareness of your breathing.

5. Continue this quiet, nonjudgmental observation for about 10 minutes.

6. Open your eyes and notice how you feel. Don't evaluate, just observe.

The key to learning to practice meditation is to accept the world around you from a place of curious observation. This meditative practice may soon spill into other areas of your life, as you notice yourself observing rather than reacting during difficult situations or times of worry.

GAD primarily involves unrelenting worry—if you can learn to accept those worries without letting them upset you, then your distress is likely to diminish.

What If I Can't Meditate?

There are many reasons why you might find it hard to meditate or be mindful. You might have trouble observing without judging or you may feel impatient or as though there is "too much to do" to be sitting around breathing. Some people have trouble doing nothing, as they are used to always being on the go. Other times, you might find that you can't stop the negative thoughts from intruding as you try to relax.

The best advice to overcome these obstacles is twofold:

Recognize that this will take time. Don't expect your first meditation session to be easy. As silly as it may sound, it takes practice to learn how to do nothing. Eventually, it will come easier.

Make time. Just as this will take time, you need to make time for it. Schedule it into your day just like your job or an appointment. Don't make it an option not to practice; tell yourself that you just need to get it done. Sometimes, when you've got too much to do and can't fit in time for a quiet moment, you may find afterward that the quiet moment helped you to return to your day more centered and better at problem-solving.

A Word From Verywell

As you begin to practice meditation, ask yourself questions such as the following:

Were you able to observe your anxious thoughts without judging them?

Did you achieve a state of focused observation?

Did you feel relaxed?

Keep a journal to track your progress and note if your anxiety is reduced. If, over time, you still face troubling anxiety that is chronic and severe, be sure to talk with your doctor about treatment options.

Article presented by click here for more details on the author www.verywellmind.com

Three Enticing Ways to Improve Communication and Intimacy

Thu, 28 May 2020 22:50:13 GMT

Ways to Improve Communication and Intimacy!

We all know that being a good listener goes a long way to increasing harmony and intimacy in a relationship. But what about the person doing the talking? Can he or she say whatever is on their mind and hope for the best? The simple answer is no. For a relationship to really shine, the speaker must share in the responsibility of making sure the conversation goes smoothly.

So how can you express yourself and your needs in a way that both honors the relationship and gives you the best chance of meeting your needs? By using what I call "the three laws of speaking." The word “law” may sound a bit strong, but if couples know what to expect when they communicate with their partner, they’re apt to feel safer, which is likely to foster closeness and intimacy.

Law of Speaking #1. You have a choice.

Probably one of the biggest myths perpetuated by pop psychology is the notion that it's healthy to "let all your feelings out." This idea came from Freud's "hydraulic model" of emotions. He wrote that unexpressed feelings can build up if not released, any eventually exert so much pressure on the dam that it breaks, flooding the entire system. Modern research has shown the flaws in this model, especially in regard to certain negative feelings. For example, results from numerous studies show that the cathartic expression of anger only leads to increased feelings of anger. My clinical work also supports this. I’ve observed over and over again that couples meet with disaster when they mistakenly assume that it's a good thing to share all their thoughts and feelings, whenever and however the mood strikes them.

To put this in more practical terms, you must remember that you have a choice. Simply because you experience a feeling doesn't mean you have to express it right then and there. Imagine, for example, that checking your credit card statement online, and you're angry about something your partner bought – you think it's an extravagant purchase, and wish you'd been consulted. Given that you're angry, here's a list of some of the choices you can make:

Whether or not you will express your feelings to your partner. Maybe you'll decide it's not really such a big deal after all.

When to express your feelings to your partner. Do you choose to say something at the very moment when your experience that feeling? Do you wait until you calm down? Do you find a time when your partner might be more receptive?

How you express your feelings to your partner. Do you yell, scream, whine, or pout? Do you calmly tell your partner how you feel? Are you direct? Or do you express your angry feelings passively, perhaps by doing something to retaliate or get even?

How you'll care for yourself and your relationship. Do you take steps to soothe yourself and calm yourself down? You don't have to tell your partner every feeling about every incident. You have other options: writing in a journal, exercising, reading something funny… Or do you go over in your mind all the past times your partner has done something that made you angry, adding fuel to the fire?

It might seem as if I’m asking you to be over-controlled in your expression of feelings, but I’m not. Certainly, being emotionally shutdown is not the way to create a healthy relationship. But the benefits of expressing your feelings must be balanced against the potential to do harm to the integrity of the relationship, and to your partner’s self-esteem. The key is when and how to express your feelings.

Law of Speaking #2: Assume responsibility for your thoughts and feelings.

In communicating with your partner, you must accept the fact that you alone are responsible for your feelings. No one can "make you mad" – you choose your reactions. Certainly, external factors can conspire to make it more likely that you'll feel one way or another. For example, if your spouse approaches you in a loud, argumentative tone, accusing you of something you didn't do, you're likely to feel somewhat self-righteous and defensive. It's up to you whether to act on these feelings or to change your thinking in such a way that other feelings can take their place. You might know that your spouse has been under a lot of pressure lately, and your empathy might allow you to react in a completely different, much more generous manner. Ultimately, we all create our own reality. Keeping this in mind, you can polish the rough edges of your statements by prefacing them with, "I think…" Or "I feel…" This alerts your partner to the fact that you're owning your thoughts and feelings: you're making it perfectly clear that you realize that your perceptions are subjective.

Law of Speaking #3: Speak with kindness and clarity.

It's helpful when you're talking with your partner about some negative feeling or some complaint to also include positive feelings you have. For example, if you're annoyed that your partner didn't do the dishes as he promised, you could begin your conversation noting how much you appreciate the time he spends with the children in the evening. You might also say, "I know you've been working hard all day, but I really need your help with the dishes tonight." Also, show your partner you're aware of the impact your statements may have. You might start out by saying, "I know it's hard for you when I say things that sound critical…" Remember, your partner is your friend, lover, and companion: your goal is not only to communicate your feelings fully, but also as graciously as possible. In addition, speak with as much clarity as you can muster. By clarity I mean: stay in the present (don't dredge up old dirt) and stick with the salient points. No matter what the content, aim for self-expression to be an opportunity to strengthen the core feelings of love and affection that originally drew you together.

Summary of key points:

State your views as your own thoughts and feelings, acknowledging your subjectivity. Begin your statements with "I think…" Or "I feel…" rather than "you never…" Or "you always…"

When expressing negative emotions or criticisms, also include any positive feelings you have about your partner or the situation.

Make your statements as specific as possible.

While expressing yourself, demonstrate your respect for your partner by showing that you are aware of the impact that your statements may have. Show that you care about your partner’s feelings.

Stick to one subject at a time whenever possible.

By following these guidelines, you'll learn to express yourself in a manner that not only shows respect for your partner, but also help you present your own needs and wishes in a way that makes your partner more willing to help and brings you closer together.

Click here for more on the author: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-the-questions/201606/three-enticing-ways-improve-communication-and-intimacy

How Do You Cope When A Loved One Has An Addiction?

Sat, 09 May 2020 21:22:40 GMT

How Do You Cope When A Loved One Has An Addiction?

One of the toughest problems faced by families today is learning that a husband, wife, son, daughter or another loved one, has an addiction. Whether the addiction is to alcohol or drugs makes little difference to those staring the problem in the face. Upon learning the news of the addiction, the reaction is often shock and dismay.

It is normal for family members to feel crushed, hopeless, frightened and overwhelmed by the problem. Many people react by asking the age old question, “what did I do wrong?” It is also normal to react by appealing to the addicted family member to stop using the drug. (Note: The word “drug” will be used to represent both alcohol and other substances). There is a tendency to appeal to the love and emotions of the drug using individual. Very soon after learning about the problem, many people want to control the person and the situation. They mistakenly believe that they can force the use of substances to end. They think such things as, “If I cry enough, yell enough, control enough, threaten enough, express disappointment enough, threaten divorce enough,” the afflicted individual will stop. In fact, the drug abusing person will probably make all types of promises to satisfy all the demands made by family and friends. Soon after, and with huge disappointment and frustration, everyone discovers that the promises were empty and the addiction either resumed or never ended. For many, this becomes a never ending process of emotional storminess that can affect the health and well being of all involved. Why? The answer is that the addiction simply continues either unabated or with great acceleration.

There is a bitter lesson to be learned by every loved one who ever had to deal with this tragedy. That lesson is that there is nothing anyone can do to stop the addictive process. This creates huge feelings of helplessness. In fact, from beginning to end, coping with someone who has an addiction, leaves everyone totally frustrated and helpless.

So, how does one cope?

There is no easy answer to the question of “how to cope.” Where a marriage is concerned, there is always the possibility of divorcing the spouse who is abusing substances and sometimes that is the only way out of the situation. However, as many have pointed out to me over the years of working in this area, “you cannot divorce your children, even if they are now adult addicts.” This is true, of course. Also, is it not insensitive and cruel to divorce a spouse who is ill with drug abuse?

Harvard Medical School publishes many useful and informative manuals for public consumption that deal with health and mental health issues. One of them is called “Overcoming Addiction: Paths toward recovery,” a Special Health Report. This and many other manuals can be ordered at:

http://www.health.harvard.edu

If you want to read their specific article, titled, “When a loved one has an addiction” it can be found:

https://www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/HEALTHbeat_011309.htm

The Harvard report on drug abuse points out that loved ones must take good care of themselves first. They compare this idea to the instructions given during air travel and it is that each passenger must first put on their oxygen mask before helping anyone else, whether someone who is a child or an elderly person.

This notion that each and every individual must first care for their self is vitally important in learning to cope with the addiction of another person. If family and friends make themselves ill over the addiction, it will still not put a stop to its steady progress.

This is the reason why it is important for family members to attend either Al anon or Ala teen meetings. Al-anon is for adults coping with a spouse, child, friend, or family member with an addiction and Ala-teen is for young people whose lives have been affected by someone else’s drinking. They are both off shoots of Alcoholics Anonymous. These meetings are free and are comprised of other family members who are coping with the same or similar problem. What is most important is the messages at these meetings are that, 1. The addiction is the fault of no one and, therefore both self blame and blaming of others should stop, and, 2. That family and friends have no control over the addictive process and must finally admit to this painful fact. Meeting places for these organizations can be found on the Internet.

In addition to these types of self help meetings (not instead of) it could be useful for family members to enter psychotherapy. The purpose of the therapy is not to help the addict but the family member who is suffering painful feelings of guilt, anger, depression and confusion. If those aren’t enough reasons to seek help then what else is?

Thanks to some of the Television programs that focus on this problem, such as “Intervention,” many are now aware that it is possible to stage an intervention in which the addicted individual is confronted with their problem and encouraged to immediately enter a drug rehabilitation program. It is best that this be planned, organized and led by an expert professional in the field of addiction. There are too many “dangerous land mines” for any family to undertake an intervention on their own.

Here are some additional suggestions made by the Harvard manual:

If someone you love has a problem with addiction, there are some things you can do to help:

1. Speak up. Express your concerns about your loved one’s problem in a caring way.

2. Take care of yourself. Seek out the people and resources that can support you. Keep in mind that you are not alone, and try to remain hopeful. Practical help is available in your community.

3. Don’t make excuses. Don’t make it easier for your loved one to use his or her object of addiction by lying to protect him or her from the consequences of that use.

4. Don’t blame yourself. Remember that you are not to blame for this problem and you can’t control it. Allow the person with the problem to take responsibility.

5. Be safe. Don’t put yourself in dangerous situations. Find a friend you can call for assistance.

6. Step back. Don’t argue, lecture, accuse, or threaten. Try to remain neutral.

7. Be positive. Remember that addiction is treatable. You may want to learn about what kinds of treatment are available and discuss these options with your loved one.

8. Take action. Consider staging a family meeting or an intervention.

9. Focus your energies. Encourage your friend or family member to get help, but try not to push.

10. Remember that the only person you can change is yourself. Don’t hesitate to use available resources to help yourself.

Comments and questions are, as always, encouraged.

Allan N. Schwartz, PhD. Click Here for more information from the Author https://www.mentalhelp.net/contributors/schwartz/

Understanding Your Diagnosis

Fri, 24 Apr 2020 16:37:29 GMT

Understanding Your Diagnosis

Some people with mental health conditions experience relief and hope when they get a diagnosis. Others may feel like a diagnosis is "just words."

You may even feel several competing emotions at the same time—relief at having a name for the things bothering you, but fear and anger that you have an illness. You may feel that the diagnosis you received carries negative or damaging perceptions and may not want to accept it, but getting a diagnosis is a useful step in receiving effective treatment and improving your quality of life.

Getting A Diagnosis

Unlike diabetes or cancer there is no medical test that can provide a diagnosis of mental illness. A health care professional can do a number of things in an evaluation including a physical exam and long term monitoring to rule out any underlying medical conditions that may be causing symptoms.

Once other medical conditions are ruled out, a person might be referred to a mental health professional that will use The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fifth edition (DSM-5), to make a diagnosis. The DSM-5, published by the American Psychiatric Association lists criteria including feelings, symptoms and behaviors over a period of time that a person must meet in order to be officially diagnosed with an illness.

Why A Diagnosis Matters

A medical professional determines a diagnosis by interviewing you about your history of symptoms. Sometimes a doctor will require a couple of medical tests to rule out possible physical ailments, but we cannot evaluate mental health itself through blood tests or other biometric data. Instead, doctors use their experience to determine how your set of symptoms fit into what we know about mental health.

The diagnosis is an important tool for you and your doctor. Doctors and therapists use a diagnosis to advise you on treatment options and future health risks.

Another reason a diagnosis matters is that it tells health insurance companies that you have a condition requiring medical care. A doctor's diagnosis is also necessary to qualify for Social Security disability support or for job protection under the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Even though labeling your symptoms doesn't automatically relieve them, congratulate yourself on having moved forward in the process of getting treatment and protecting your rights.

What Next

You may already have learned as much as possible about mental illness, or you may be facing the topic for the first time. In either case, a diagnosis is a good starting point for learning more.

When your doctor talks about your condition, take notes so you can look up your diagnosis later. Ask your doctor to recommend books and websites with additional information. When you read about your condition, you may find your symptoms match in some ways and don't match in others. This is normal.

Focus on learning about symptoms and treatments. You may come across discouraging predictions about how it's impossible to "cure" serious mental illness. However, with treatment you can reduce or eliminate your symptoms. A diagnosis is a gateway to good treatment, not a sentence to lifetime imprisonment.

If you haven't already found a support group, this is a good time to reach out to others with your condition. NAMI's Peer-to-Peer classes and discussion groups can provide encouragement and advice from people who are living well with mental illnesses.

What If You Disagree About Your Diagnosis?

After reading about your condition, you may have questions for your doctor. How do your symptoms match this diagnosis rather than another? Couldn't it be something else? What if it's a physical illness instead or a misunderstanding?

It's important to feel that your doctor considered all the possibilities. If you disagree with your doctor's evaluation, however, don't automatically quit working with him or her. Your doctor is already familiar with your symptoms, and the diagnosis is simply a tool to help you and your doctor address those symptoms. If possible, it's worth it to stick with a doctor who already knows you.

Ask yourself if you can work with this doctor, not if you believe in this diagnosis. When you discuss your concerns, does your doctor listen to you? Try to answer your questions? Does your doctor show sympathy? Understand your goals? What treatment does the doctor recommend for helping you meet those goals?

Consider whether you can "agree to disagree" about the exact diagnosis, while agreeing to try out the doctor's recommendations for a certain period of time.

Reevaluating A Diagnosis

A diagnosis is only as good as the treatment it leads to. Whether or not you feel confident in your diagnosis, it's important to reevaluate occasionally.

After pursuing treatment for a time, you and your doctor should meet to discuss your progress. Consider how treatment is helping your condition, or if it doesn't seem to be helping. If treatment isn't sufficient, other options for treatment can be considered or changing your diagnosis.

A mental health professional makes the best diagnosis possible with the information they have. Over time, as you work together, he or she will observe you, listen to you, and gather new information to help refine your diagnosis. Your diagnosis is the beginning of an investigation into how to make your life better.

National Alliance for Mental Health (NAMI) https://www.nami.org/Your-Journey/Individuals-with-Mental-Illness/Understanding-Your-Diagnosis

How to Get Therapy When You Can't Leave the House

Mon, 13 Apr 2020 18:37:17 GMT

How to Get Therapy When You Can't Leave the House

With the U.S. at the epicenter of a global pandemic, therapy sessions (or goals to start them) might be taking a back seat. But between telecommuting, home schooling, unemployment woes, toilet paper shortages and an ever-present sense of doom, mental health care is more important than ever.

A new poll by the Kaiser Family Foundation found that 45% of adults say the pandemic has affected their mental health. But as states battle the spread of the coronavirus with stay-at-home orders, people can't attend their regular therapy sessions.

Good news: There are ways to start or continue therapy right where you are. Some are even free.

Shereen Marisol Meraji, Life Kit guest host and co-host of NPR's Code Switch, talked to NPR's Lauren Hodges about some at-home therapy options.

This conversation has been edited for length and clarity.

For people who aren't in therapy, why might they want to consider it now — especially when we can't walk into a therapist's office anytime soon?

Well, because this is a really stressful time! The news is scary and depressing, but we kind of have to stay on top of it, keep watching, keep reading to get the latest guidance from the government: How long are schools closed? Are we allowed outside? Which businesses are open?

We're also home-schooling kids, dealing with unemployment or less income, worried about sick friends and relatives. It's a lot. And it can be really helpful to talk to a third party, let off some steam and get a little advice to manage it.

What about cost? People are worried about money right now. Is therapy covered by insurance?

If you have insurance, it depends on the plan. Check your policy. Make sure it's covered. And your insurance company can also give you a list of options and names so you don't waste your time talking to people who don't take your insurance.

If you already have a therapist, just ask them how they can continue your sessions and if anything will change with their copays. Since this is such an unprecedented situation, they might still be figuring it out. That also could mean they're flexible and open to suggestions that could work for you.

What If I Don't Have Insurance?

I know a lot of people are dealing with losing their insurance under their former employers. You do have options. You can ask for the sliding-scale rate, meaning the therapist works with you based on what you can afford. There's also this website called Open Path Collective, where therapists offer sessions for between $30 and $60. That's a pretty typical copay for insured patients. Call some of those people, ask how they're holding sessions right now and what they're doing to go online.

And it's worth mentioning during this national emergency, Medicare coverage will now include three types of virtual services: telehealth visits, virtual check-ins and e-visits. So if you have Medicare, a good way to use this benefit is to search for providers that accept it. I searched on Psychology Today, filtered for Medicare in the insurance option and found providers that take it.

If you already have a therapist, how easy is it to make this switch to online or teletherapy?

I talked to Seth Gillihan, a clinical psychologist in Philadelphia. He has switched all of his patient sessions online. He said it might feel weird for the first few minutes of that first video chat but that you'll hardly notice it after a while: "What people seem to find is that you forget about the medium relatively quickly. I think about it kind of like watching a movie. At some point you stop being aware of the fact that you're staring at a screen, and you get really immersed in the story."

So get set up on your phone or laptop, make sure you've downloaded the right app, find a comfortable, private spot away from your family or roommates. Go into a closet if you have to! Make sure your Wi-Fi is good. And just like regular therapy sessions, you can write down some stuff you want to talk about beforehand. Or you could just wing it and see what comes up for you.

One caveat I do want to mention: Make sure to ask your provider if they're licensed to treat you in whatever medium you're seeking therapy.

Is it still going to be effective?

I think it's pretty helpful to have that neutral person to process our frustrations and confusions with, no matter how we're talking to them. It can be tempting to talk to friends and family members about our problems because they're right there. But over time, that can be emotionally draining and taxing on our relationships. Therapists are trained professionals. They can give us advice, help us gain perspective. And they're bound by the law to keep things confidential. So that's a big plus with them.

Are there other options?

There are apps specifically designed for online therapy that use text and video messaging. They've been around for a couple years. So they were ahead of this whole curve. BetterHelp, Talkspace and Larkr are a few that come to mind. (We should mention that BetterHelp is an NPR sponsor.)

And there are a lot of support groups that have moved online right now. One of the more well-known ones is Alcoholics Anonymous. They've been using Zoom, Google Hangout[s] and conference calls to keep their members coming to meetings.

I went on Psychology Today and looked up local groups that meet all these different needs — grief counseling, anger management, addictions, whatever the issue is. And they all have group managers you can reach out to. Ask them how they're arranging these digital meetups. The best thing is a lot of these groups are free or low cost.

I also want to put out some free 24-hour hotlines for people who might not have Wi-Fi or who are just really struggling and really need to talk to someone right now, maybe on off hours or just don't have any money to spend on therapy or mental health counseling. The Department of Health and Human Services has the National Helpline. That's 1-800-662-4357. There's a group called Integral Care. They run a hotline with 15 languages. They're at 512-472-HELP.

And because this can feel like a really hopeless time for some people, I want to share the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, which is 1-800-273-8255. Please call if you're thinking of hurting yourself. There is definitely help waiting for you, no matter your situation.

Let's do a quick recap. What are the most important things to know about getting therapy right now?

It can feel really tempting to put your mental health on the back burner right now because there's so much happening. But you might need help more than ever. And it's not great to just constantly download that onto your friends and family because they're going through the same thing too. Therapists are trained professionals. They have confidentiality in mind. If you have insurance, you can ask your insurance company to help you find a provider or a method. And if you don't have insurance, there are lots of free options and low-cost options for you out there.

For information on the Author Click Here

https://www.npr.org/people/347731418/lauren-hodges

Anxiety-Tips on Reducing Anxiety

Sun, 05 Apr 2020 00:37:32 GMT

Tips on reducing Anxiety

Anxiety is a well-known state of mind and each of us will experience it at some point in our lives. For most of us, anxiety will feel uncomfortable — a nuisance to be dealt with the best we can — and will inevitably visit us during some major life occasions/transitions/decisions. For some, it will come more frequently, coloring much of the activities of daily life. For others, it will feel like torture, seeming to control every waking hour and wreaking havoc on a regular basis.

Looked at in the most positive light, anxiety is a “red alert” telling us that something is wrong and requires our immediate attention — and it won’t kill us.

Many of us are able to handle the discomfort of anxiety on our own with no outside intervention, but others may need some help to learn how to manage the mental and physical discomfort, and gain insight and coping skills.

Here are 5 strategies that can help make anxiety easier to deal with:

1. Challenge anxious thoughts.

A lot of thinking is negative and irrational. You may think the worst will happen and may convince yourself that what you feel is going to happen is based in reality, when there may be no actual basis for believing this. You may be so used to thinking about the worst-case scenario presenting itself that thinking any other way has become alien to you. You need to stop and challenge what you believe to be true about what you fear and what negatively occupies your thoughts.

In other words, you need to retrain your thinking to learn to process what happens to you in a different way, instead of jumping into the usual patterns that feed your anxiety. Ask yourself: How do you know your anxious thoughts are based in reality? How likely is it that what you fear will actually happen? Is there perhaps a more realistic way to think about what could/will happen? Can you visualize a more positive outcome?

2. Recognize some negative thinking patterns that foster worry, fear, and anxiety.

Be careful about seeing things as either/or, should/shouldn’t, right/wrong, or black/white with no shades of gray. Be aware of the tendency to exaggerate the negative and diminish the positive. Become conscious of drawing the wrong conclusions based on incorrect, incomplete, and inconclusive evidence. Understand your tendency to jump to catastrophe as the outcome. Be aware of diminishing your own capability to successfully get through a situation. And challenge the imagined scenario of being humiliated, criticized, and judged because you feel you are incapable of rising to the occasion and conquering your fears and anxieties.

3. Cultivate optimistic thinking.

Psychologist Martin Seligman believes that people can learn how to think optimistically. It begins with teaching yourself to keep thinking about the specific, rather than the general — how your worry or fear fits into the bigger picture of your life, rather than becoming the bigger picture of your life — because your life is much, much bigger than any worry, fear, or anxiety will ever be.

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The suggestion is that by creating a thinking strategy that explains a problem or issue, you are better able to make a plan to do something about it. In other words, de-personalize the problem; take yourself out of it so you can do something about changing the situation, rather than being part of the problem, where you may feel helpless and powerless to control the situation. Think about situations or problems as temporary and changeable, rather than long-term or permanent. That way, they can change.

Creating a thinking model that places the outcome within your control allows you to manage the situation. Taking even baby steps can lead the way to constructive solutions, rather than feeling overwhelmed, defeated, and stuck.

4. Take a timeout.

Give your brain a break. Take a mental vacation with mindful meditation or a walk in nature. Relaxation and leisure are essential to a full, balanced life. If this is alien to you, it’s time to start scheduling some R&R into your weekly calendar. Yoga, listening to music, self-nurturing (e.g., massage), anything that takes you out of your head and incessant worrying is beneficial to your all-around well-being. And, of course, focus on living a healthy lifestyle — eating well, exercising daily, getting enough sleep, and anything else that helps you express your healthy, whole presence in the world.

5. Create an anxiety toolbox.

During years of practice, I inadvertently (but thankfully) created the idea of the therapeutic "toolbox." I wanted to give my patients tools to manage their own issues, especially when they left therapy. Following are some tools for anxiety that you can carry with you and use whenever the need arises:

Asking questions. Based on past experiences, have a set of questions ready to ask yourself when anxiety hits: Am I blowing the situation, and my anxiety, out of proportion? On a scale of 1 to 10, where does the situation and the accompanying anxiety realistically sit? Have the catastrophic consequences and the worst-case scenario I always worry about ever come to pass? Even if something is really wrong, am I capable of finding a healthier/more satisfactory solution? In other words, create a better reality (and outcome) based on your successful responses to past experiences.

To learn more by Abigail Brenner, M.D., a psychiatrist in private practice. She is the author of Transitions: How Women Embrace Change and Celebrate Life and other books. Click Here

How To Stay Centered During Stressful Times

Thu, 12 Mar 2020 11:33:30 GMT

It can be easy to become uncentered due to things that occur in our daily lives. When we feel uncentered, we feel as though we’re being spread too thin in many different directions. Our minds can become crowded with thoughts and we can feel anxious or stressed in our bodies.

When left unchecked, prolonged stress can lead to diseases, lowered immunity, tiredness, fatigue, and burnout. Long term stress can also lead to depression, anxiety, and social or communication issues. Another important point to keep in mind is that how we react to stress determines how stressed we actually feel, as well as our outlook on life. For example, two people could be in the exact same stressful situation, but if one has learned to reframe that situation in a positive light—or learned how to react less to it—that person will have a completely different experience than the other.

Regular yoga, pranayama, and meditation practice can help us to combat stress and help us with how we respond to stressful situations. By quieting the mind and allowing ourselves to be more deeply aware of the present moment, we can start to become more mindful of our emotions, our thoughts, and how we react to stressful situations. It’s important to take time each day to sit in stillness for a few moments to rediscover the place of centeredness in ourselves. As we practice sitting with this place of centering, we often find that we can access our centeredness more easily in times of chaos or stress. By strengthening our connection to it, we can allow this space of being centered to guide us in every moment. Some other ways we can return to our centers are taking walks daily, being in nature, eating healthy, journaling, yoga, breathwork, or meditation

By practicing calming the mind and building awareness of ourselves and the world around us, we gain dominion over our thoughts and our emotions.

Here are a few simple practices you can do today to help you feel more grounded in times of stress.

5 Simple Centering Practices

1. Centering Breath Practice

The simplest way to center in any moment of our lives is through our breath. The best part of this practice is that is easy and we can do it anytime we begin to feel stressed. To practice this centering breath practice, find a pace of breathing that feels good to you. Then, as you inhale, say the words I’m breathing in either out loud or internally. As you exhale, say the words I’m breathing out either out loud or internally. Repeat this up to a minute or longer. If you find that your mind wanders away, just gently bring your awareness back to this centering breath practice.

2. Sitting Grounding Practice

Grounding and feeling rooted helps us get in touch with feelings of stability and support. To practice, begin in a comfortable seated pose, with eyes either closed or open. Begin to center your mind with your breath; breathing deeply. Bring awareness to your sit bones and your connection with the earth beneath you. Observe how firm and supportive it is as you connect to it. Take several breaths in and out as you feel this connection deepening and begin to feel support and stability.

3. Counting Breath Practice

Focusing on our breath and breath practices can be a powerful way in which we can turn away from fear and move towards peace. To do this practice, begin in a comfortable seated position. Start off easily with a slow three-count inhale in and a slow three-count exhale out. Then, take a deep breath in for a count of three and hold for a second. After the hold, exhale slowly for a count of three. You can do this for up to a minute, and even extend the count for up to five seconds (five seconds inhaling and five seconds exhaling out, slowly).

4. Standing Grounding Meditation

In times of stress, this simple grounding meditation can allow us to come back to the present moment. To practice, begin standing tall in Mountain (Tadasana) with your legs hip distance apart. Bring awareness to your feet rooting down into the Earth and feel supportive energy rising up from the Earth into your bodies. Engage your core and your leg muscles and feel this energy rising up all the way to the crown of your head. Bring your hands to prayer position at your chest, take several deep breaths, and take a quiet moment to express gratitude and respect to our home, Earth.

5. Calming Peace Prayer Practice

Compassion has a powerful effect on our minds and how we feel. Practicing compassion can take us from feelings of fear to feelings of love and understanding. To practice, begin in Easy pose or a comfortable seated position with your spine upright. Bring your hands to Namaste or Anjali mudra at your heart center. Allow your heart center to open and fill with love and light. Repeat the following peace prayer mantra, either out loud or internally. Imagine that you are directing this mantra to the entire world:

Lokah samastah sukhino bhavantu

This ancient Sanskrit mantra translates to, “may all beings everywhere be happy and free.” Repeat this up to ten times and feel your heart radiating with love and peace for all beings in the world.

To read more articles from Nadia Goudy, Click Here

Overcoming addiction: Decide to make a change

Mon, 17 Feb 2020 16:33:48 GMT

The 5 Stages of Addiction Recovery

Addiction is an insidious disease that can take hold quickly (in some cases, after first use of some drugs) or develop only after long-term substance abuse. Though there are certain similarities among addicted individuals, each case is unique, and is influenced by myriad biological, psychological, and social factors such as age, gender, prior drug use, the substance being abused, and family history.

Because of the intensely personal qualities of addiction, no two people will follow the identical path to recovery. For example, some people will require residential care, outpatient treatment, and years of therapy, while others will be able to bring their disease under control with medication and counseling.

Even with so many influences and factors, though, most recovering addicts will pass through similar phases and stages on their walk from the depths of addiction to the freedom and promise of long-term abstinence.

The following are five common stages of addiction recovery:

1. Awareness and Early Acknowledgement

This first stage is marked by a growing awareness that there is a problem. In some cases, this realization results from conversations with family members, friends or co-workers; in other instances, it may only occur after the addiction has led to health, financial, work, or legal problems.

Although the addict is still engaging in addictive behaviors, and hasn’t made any measurable progress toward ending those behaviors, this first stage is critical in paving the way for the rest of the recovery process.

One of the most important parts of this phase is the transition from mere awareness of the problem to actual acknowledgement that action is needed. Few experiences are as essential to an addict as the moment when he or she shifts from denial to a willingness to make a change.
2. Consideration

The second stage of the recovery process involves a shift from awareness to action. In this stage, the addicts are ready to take the first step toward recovery, often in the form of learning more about addiction and the impact it is having on their life and the lives of the people they care about.

The consideration stage is important because this is when the addict begins to look beyond himself/herself and to understand that friends, family members, and colleagues have been negatively affected by his/her choices and behaviors.

By taking the step of learning more about their disease and its effect on others, addicts in the consideration stage make the important transition from awareness to action. Though not yet actively pursuing recovery, they are moving in that direction, and are gaining potentially invaluable information and insights in the process.
3. Exploring Recovery

Moving past denial, the addict is motivated to overcome his or her addiction and begins taking small steps such as exploring the concepts of moderation and abstinence. Some say that this exploratory stage is the stage when recovery really begins.

During the exploring recovery stage, addicts may begin to educate themselves about the recovery process and what it means to live a sober life. They may consult with friends or family members who have been through similar experiences, and may also begin to collect information about treatment options.

This third stage is often when some addicts first make the critical decision to enter an addiction treatment program.
4. Early Recovery

Early recovery is a time of both great significance and significant risk.

On the positive side, addicts in early recovery have not only stopped using the substance(s) to which they were addicted, but they have also begun learning how to remain drug-free for the long term. On the less-than-positive side, early recovery is also a time of great vulnerability. The addicts are in the process of abandoning people, activities, and behaviors that have been significant parts of their lives, yet they have yet to completely establish the foundation of their newly drug-free lives.

Relapse is far from uncommon during early recovery. Slipping back into drug abuse during this period can be particularly problematic, because recovering addicts may not yet have developed the knowledge and skills that will prevent them from backsliding into full-blown addiction.

Some of the most important steps taken during Stage Four are developing new coping skills and healthy habits and rebuilding damaged relationships.
5. Active Recovery and Maintenance

By the time they reach this fifth stage, addicts have completed a great deal of work and made great progress. Perhaps most importantly, they have also learned that they will need to continue to work hard for the rest of their lives to guard against relapse (or to return to sobriety after relapsing). This will require active monitoring of their thoughts and behaviors, ongoing practice of new skills, maintaining a support system, and staying alert to triggers and temptations to use.

Although recovery is never easy, by this fifth stage, recovering addicts have begun to live lives they could scarcely have imagined at the start of this journey.

Recovery is about much more than overcoming an addiction to drugs or alcohol, It is a complete transformation of mind, body and spirit. While some individuals can progress through the stages of recovery with just the support of friends and family, most will require education and new skills from a drug rehab program.

To read more articles by CRC Health, CLICK HERE

How to Use Mindfulness to Strengthen Your Relationships

Mon, 17 Feb 2020 13:57:40 GMT

No matter how far you’ve come in your intimate relationship, cultivating love, intimacy, and union is an ongoing process. As mindfulness is the ever-unfolding compassionate, non-judgmental awareness of each and every moment, mindfulness practice and relationships go hand-in-hand. As your relationship evolves, so too does one’s mindfulness practice, both blossoming to enhance your sense of happiness, love, and equanimity.

Every interaction between you and your partner is an opportunity for mutual appreciation and togetherness. However, when tensions are high and one or both partners are not mindful of their emotions, their words, and their energy, their interactions promote the opposite of togetherness, weakening the trust, connection, and deep intimacy you both yearn for.

To strengthen your relationships in meaningful and sustainable ways, a degree of mindfulness is required. The more mindful you are of yourself and your partner, the better. Yet still, no matter how versed or unversed you are in the art of present moment awareness, your sincere efforts to explore the present moment go a long way in bringing you and your partner closer.

There are numerous ways that mindfulness can enhance your relationships. From improving emotional regulation to enhancing gratitude, the skill of remaining open and receptive to the present moment has deep implications for your relationships. These are just some of the ways that mindfulness practice has this transformative effect.
Mindfulness can help you to better navigate emotions—both yours and theirs.

When you become more mindful of your emotional landscape, self-awareness increases and you experience an increase in your ability to moderate your responses. This does not mean that you negate or deny what you are feeling. It simply means you become a clearer witness of your emotions, better able to soften your responses where it is appropriate to do so.

One of the suggested mechanisms through which this occurs is through mindfulness’s ability to promote executive control. Mindfulness increases your sensitivity to your experience, which helps you to understand and respond in new ways.

But what does this have to do with relationships? As you can understand when you are the receiver of your partner’s emotions, the way an emotion is expressed impacts your ability to receive it with love. When someone lashes out, for instance, the body’s response is to defend or pull away, neither of which promotes togetherness or healing.

By becoming more attuned to your emotions, you start to express yourself in ways that embody both raw honesty and compassion. This sets the stage for how a difficult conversation with your partner will play out.

So, when emotions are running high and impacting your interactions with your partner, you can:
Turn towards the emotion.

Your instinct might be to turn away from challenging emotions as they arise (whether within yourself or your partner). However, Gottman’s principle of “turning towards instead of away” exemplifies a more mindful approach you might take when you or your partner is experiencing a strong emotion.

If you are experiencing a strong emotion, you can turn towards it by taking a few deep breaths, softening the mind, and paying attention to the sensations and stories that are moving through us. After a few moments, you might try to express yourself in a new way. It can be helpful to focus on your own needs, hopes, and desires, rather than expressing the other’s wrongdoings.

If your partner is the one experiencing a strong emotion, you can become mindful of your own instincts to defend, to turn away from, or to invalidate. Instead, you can take a few deep breaths through the heart and encourage a mutual, thoughtful exploration of what is present.
Create space between yourself and this wave of energy.

When an emotion is present, you can create a bit of distance between it and yourself. If you are the one feeling emotional, you can mindfully acknowledge the feelings that are present, removing the sense of ‘I’ from your observations. So, rather than noting ‘I am furious’, you would simply note ‘anger’, tuning into the physiological expressions of this emotion as well.

If your partner is the one experiencing the strong emotion, you can compassionately remind yourself that you do not have to swim in the same waters. You can be more like the steady rock beneath the waves that are moving, helping your partner to mindfully inquire about and express what is there.
Mindfulness practice helps to shift unconscious behaviors that impact your relationships.

Since many of your behaviors and responses in relationships are conditioned and habitual, shifting them in positive ways takes more than conscious effort. Mindfulness practice helps to make these shifts.

First, mindfulness increases your awareness of your habitual behaviors. You begin to recognize, through mindfulness exercises, that your thoughts and feelings do not truly belong to you. Instead, they are waves of energy that move through you in one way or another for a multitude of reasons. Your conditioned beliefs and your personal history largely define how you respond in various circumstances. As you become more aware of this, you become empowered to shift your responses – or to at least catch them after they have risen.

Second, research shows that mindfulness training shifts neural circuits in both structural and functional ways. These shifts change your brain’s automatic responses to events. In other words, your brain literally rewires to adopt new ways of responding.

This adjustment in your automatic responses impacts your ability to pay attention, to regulate your emotion and physiology, and shifts your capacity for empathy. And, as Gottman notes, the ability to regulate your emotions (both during and after conflict) is largely connected with the stability and satisfaction you experience in your intimate relationships.

Countless mindfulness exercises will help you to gain these benefits on your brain’s subconscious behaviors. Some specific practices you might like to consider in the context of relationships include:

    Meditations that address emotions
    Loving-kindness practices
    Stress-reduction meditations

Mindfulness practice can increase your sense of appreciation and gratitude for your partner.

Mindfulness practice does not only enhance your sense of inner awareness. It also helps to increase your awareness of the beauty and blessings in your life. Exploring mindful gratitude practices can help to train your mind to see what’s right over what’s wrong – to see opportunity or challenge instead of signs of defeat.

Research supports this, showing that gratitude practiced in intimate relationships increases relationship connection and satisfaction the day after expressed – both for the giver and the receiver. So, gratitude is not a one-sided offering; it’s mutually beneficial.

There are a variety of ways to practice gratitude. Some can be directly linked to your intimate relationship though this is not the only way to enhance your capacity for gratitude. Some techniques worth exploring include:

Letter of Appreciation – Putting to words in the form of a heartfelt letter all that you love and appreciate about your partner.

Daily Expressions of Gratitude – Being mindful to share your thoughts of appreciation with your partner, such as thanking them for taking on an extra household chore or for preparing a lovely meal

Dinnertime Gratitude Practice – Taking a silent moment before dinner to mentally go through all that was wonderful about your day – partner included.

Mindfulness lowers the stress response, making you more open to your partner.

Last but certainly not least, the benefits of mindfulness on your relationships stems largely from its ability to lower stress levels. Mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) and many other mindfulness practices are scientifically proven to help improve the way you respond to stress.

When you are interacting with your partner, your exchange is bound to be the most fruitful, the most meaningful, and the most intimate when your stress levels are low. If you are physiologically or psychologically in a state of stress, you are less present with what is in front of you. So, even in neutral interactions, low stress levels will help you to be more in touch with your partner.

To practice easing the stress response, you can explore the simple belly breathing technique. This can be practiced either seated or lying down.

Finding a comfortable position, take a moment to ground yourself through slow, natural breaths for one to two minutes.

Once settled, place one hand on the belly and one hand on the chest. Now, as you breathe, see if you can let incoming air fill your stomach rather than creating a rise in the chest.

Notice which hands are moving on both inhalation and exhalation. The upper hand might shift slightly, but most ‘rise’ should be in the hand that is on your belly. It is easiest to observe this when lying down, so beginners might begin practicing that in that position.

Practice belly breathing for 5 minutes daily to help lower the body’s stress response.

Regardless of which lens you look at this through, both science and experience show that mindfulness practice helps to promote healthy and happy relationships. The more you practice, the easier it becomes to embody the wisdom, love, and patience that is inherent in these practices. When exploring your relationship mindfully, remember to harness compassion for yourself and your partner as you learn to navigate your union in new ways. Old habits might take some time to shift, but when both hearts are open, even the transition phase is witnessed as a beautiful and necessary part of the journey.

To read more articles by Gillian Florence Sanger, Click Here.

How To Maintain Independence While in a Relationship

Mon, 17 Feb 2020 13:52:47 GMT

Friends and media tell us about breakups where people emerge with no sense of self. Who am I now that I’m single? Healthy relationships thrive on both partners being able to maintain a clear sense of self, especially when it comes to their most fundamental needs and desires. Even knowing this, however, it’s still easy to accidentally find yourself giving more to the relationship or your partner than is ultimately sustainable.

We can wear ourselves out in relationships through the best intentions and desire, and so often it’s because we want what a loving relationship promises — love and acceptance — that we’re willing to give up our own independence and perspective in order to have it.

With this in mind, it’s important to ask — how can you maintain your independence while in a relationship?

Know Your Habits, Understand Your History

Even if you have an concept of what an ideal relationship might look like, it is worth a re-examination of your past experiences to better understand how your relationships work. In their book Attached, Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller draw upon decades of psychology research to describe that how we were nurtured as children can deeply affect the way we deal with our adult relationships. Their outline of attachment suggests that we each generally behave in relationships in one of three ways:

    Anxious — preoccupation with being loved back by intimate partners
    Avoidant — concern over loss of independence by being overwhelmed in intimate relationships
    Secure — comfortable with intimacy

Even when we had relatively calm and safe upbringings, how we were treated when expressing fear, distress, and insecurity as children taught us patterns of how we are supposed to be loved. Too little or too much response to those negative feelings required us to adjust our modes of behavior. We may avoid intimacy even if we want it, or we may have subconscious fears of abandonment or betrayal, even with the most trustworthy of partners.

Find Self Love

The vulnerability in expressing need leaves us open to feeling how we deserve to be treated. In early development, that self-image is formed quite clearly. In Attachment In Adulthood: Structure, Dynamics, And Change, researchers Mario Mikulincer and Phillip Shaver outline the correlation between attachment style and self image.

In it, they show that our partners can reaffirm our self image by behaving in patterns that are familiar to us, even when patterns are destructive or abusive. However, it is important to not confuse these patterns with stability, nor are they a replacement for growth as an individual. A loving and supportive partner is one who loves and encourages the path to self discovery, both within the relationship and during time spent alone.

Reunite Again And Again

Mindful time apart can lead to a bond stronger than before. Solitude and privacy are so often confused with hiding and secrecy, but it’s only in being alone do we get perspective on our true identity and where our emotions and needs may have changed.

Time apart for self reflection may inform our relationships in ways that even the most thorough and open discussions cannot. Internal emotional changes, new perspectives, and emerging desires are sometimes only apparent with enough time to let them be seen. Surprising or even scary at first, those self discoveries are ultimately gifts for you to share with your partner and deepen your bond with renewed understanding and care.

A lasting relationship cannot be sustained by the fear of what could be lost by being apart. Healthy independence within a relationship allows you and your partner to feel the love gained by being together, and to choose that love again and again.

Writing about emotions may ease stress and trauma

Mon, 10 Feb 2020 13:52:47 GMT

Stress, trauma, and unexpected life developments — such as a cancer diagnosis, a car accident, or a layoff — can throw people off stride emotionally and mentally. Writing about thoughts and feelings that arise from a traumatic or stressful life experience — called expressive writing — may help some people cope with the emotional fallout of such events. But it's not a cure-all, and it won't work for everyone. Expressive writing appears to be more effective for people who are not also struggling with ongoing or severe mental health challenges, such as major depression or post-traumatic stress disorder.
Testing the theory

Dr. James W. Pennebaker, currently chair of the psychology department at the University of Texas, Austin, has conducted much of the research on the health benefits of expressive writing. In one early study, Dr. Pennebaker asked 46 healthy college students to write about either personally traumatic life events or trivial topics for 15 minutes on four consecutive days. For six months following the experiment, students who wrote about traumatic events visited the campus health center less often, and used a pain reliever less frequently, than those who wrote about inconsequential matters.

Most studies have evaluated the impact of expressive writing on people with physical health conditions such as sleep apnea, asthma, migraine headaches, rheumatoid arthritis, HIV, and cancer. Likewise, most of the outcomes measured are physical, and the findings — such as blood pressure and heart rate — suggest that expressive writing initially may upset people but eventually helps them to relax.

More recently, researchers have evaluated whether expressive writing helps reduce stress and anxiety. One study found that this technique reduced stigma-related stress in gay men. Another found that it benefited chronically stressed caregivers of older adults. And a study by researchers at the University of Chicago found that anxious test-takers who wrote briefly about their thoughts and feelings before taking an important exam earned better grades than those who did not.

The standard format involves writing for a specified period each day about a particularly stressful or traumatic experience.

Participants usually write nonstop while exploring their innermost thoughts and feelings without inhibition (and the writing samples remain confidential for that reason). They may also use the exercise to understand how the traumatic event may revive memories of other stressful events.
Why writing may help

When Dr. Pennebaker and other researchers first started studying expressive writing, the prevailing theory was that it might help people overcome emotional inhibition. According to this theory, people who had suppressed a traumatic memory might learn to move beyond the experience once they expressed their emotions about it. But it's not quite that simple. Instead, multiple mechanisms may underlie the benefits of expressive writing.

The act of thinking about an experience, as well as expressing emotions, seems to be important. In this way, writing helps people to organize thoughts and give meaning to a traumatic experience.

Or the process of writing may enable them to learn to better regulate their emotions. It's also possible that writing about something fosters an intellectual process — the act of constructing a story about a traumatic event — that helps someone break free of the endless mental cycling more typical of brooding or rumination.

Finally, when people open up privately about a traumatic event, they are more likely to talk with others about it — suggesting that writing leads indirectly to reaching out for social support that can aid healing.

Timing also matters. A few studies have found that people who write about a traumatic event immediately after it occurs may actually feel worse after expressive writing, possibly because they are not yet ready to face it. As such, Dr. Pennebaker advises clinicians and patients to wait at least one or two months after a traumatic event before trying this technique.

Even with these caveats, however, expressive writing is such an easy, low-cost technique — much like taking a good brisk walk — that it may be worth trying.

To read more articles from the Harvard Health Publishing group, Click Here.

Benefits of Therapy You Probably Didn’t Know About

Fri, 07 Jun 2019 11:24:13 GMT

Many of us have a narrow view of therapy. We think it’s solely for navigating clinical depression or severe anxiety or roller-coaster moods. We think it’s only an option when we’re going through a major crisis, a big transition, or a prolonged, persistent period of grief. We think therapy is only an option when relationships become disconnected, and marriages are on the brink of divorce.

While therapy is important and vital for all the above, it’s also helpful for a lot of other reasons, and you don’t have to wait until the walls are falling down to work with a clinician. You can go when the paint is chipping—or when you’d like a different color on your walls.

In other words, therapy offers a broad array of benefits for all of us, whatever our circumstances, conditions, and concerns. Below, you’ll learn about four of these—often glossed over, forgotten about, not widely known—key benefits.

Therapy can reduce physical symptoms and boost your physical health. According to Brooke Lewis, PsyD., RCC, a registered clinical counsellor in the greater Vancouver area and co-founder of the Mental Health Boot Camp, clients can experience reductions and improvements in different physical symptoms associated with stress.

This might include a “reduction in migraines, reductions in digestive troubles, improved sleep, or improved appetite.”

For instance, Lewis worked with one client who was struggling with symptoms of anxiety and depression. She also was having ongoing digestive problems, frequent headaches, and regular cold sores. Through their work together, this client was able to identify and process painful emotions and learn strategies to soothe her nervous system. She also noticed her physical symptoms had diminished and become more infrequent. And she learned to spot these physical symptoms early so she could intervene early, and turn to various stress-relieving strategies and techniques.

Vancouver psychotherapist Chris Boyd, MA, also has found that therapy can boost physical health—and reduce the risk of future medical issues. “Research has shown that treating mental health conditions through therapy can decrease the risk of stroke, diabetes, and rheumatoid arthritis. It can decrease inflammation and blood pressure within the body,” he said. (This Time article features some of the science.)

Therapy goes beyond survival to enhancing your life. “It can help people develop and foster passion, productivity, and balance in their lives,” said Boyd, also co-founder of the Mental Health Boot Camp. For instance, he recently worked with a man who was struggling with procrastination and sinking motivation. With Boyd’s help, the client discovered that these feelings and behaviors were actually a defense mechanism he developed earlier in his life to protect him from disappointment.

“Helping the client build awareness of these patterns and respond differently in those situations assisted him with enhancing his performance at work and at home,” Boyd said.

Therapy can help you work on all kinds of goals and dreams—creating a specific plan, navigating potential internal and external obstacles, and bolstering your confidence and resilience. These goals and dreams might be anything from building a small business to becoming more self-compassionate to asserting yourself at work to cultivating a close relationship with your kids.

Therapy helps you untangle years of confusion and turmoil—and change unhealthy patterns. Eric Hotchandani’s clients regularly tell him that they “woke up one day in their mid 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, or 60s, and their life had just happened to them.” They wonder everything from how they became so unhappy in their relationships to how they became so unsatisfied with their lives.

Hotchandani, who has a private practice in Danville, Calif., has found that people fill their lives with things that aren’t fulfilling, which creates dissatisfaction. “And in that sense, their identities and purpose in life [are] filled with confusion,” Hotchandani said. “When these patterns of confusion emerge, often time negative thinking patterns follow and can become deeply embedded in their personality.”

These negative thinking patterns might be anything from “I am not good enough” to “I deserve to feel this (negative) way,” he said. Inevitably, this confusion ends up hurting relationships, too.

Hotchandani noted that in therapy clients explore these patterns, discover their origins and fear-reaching effects, and enact change, one step at a time. “[I]t is amazing how small changes can build upon each other and lead to positive revolutions in our lives.”

Therapy helps you explore your hidden desires. Therapy “brings the benefit of a broader awareness to life, to not get wrapped up in a single way of living life, to explore healthy self-expression in ways that perhaps a person had been hiding from themselves,” said David Teachout, LMHCA, a psychotherapist who joins with individuals and partnerships on their mental health journey to encourage a life of valued living and honest communication at his practice in Des Moines, WA.

For instance, Teachout has worked with clients who isolate themselves because they’re afraid of rejection, shame, or loss—all of which can happen when pursuing relationships and intimacy. But instead of keeping these clients safe and satisfied, the isolation sparks “a different level of suffering precisely because they actually do want to have those relationships and intimacy.” By helping clients realize this desire for intimacy, Teachout can then help them to explore it—and work on cultivating connected relationships with others.

In other words, we might run from the very things we yearn for—without even realizing it—because we’ve created various catastrophic stories, because we were shattered by someone or something in our past.

Therapy helps us to explore these deep desires and profound fears—and get past them, so we can create truly satisfying, fulfilling lives.

Ultimately, many of us don’t ever take the time to actually look into who we are and how we became that way, Hotchandani said. Ultimately, we don’t take the time to envision the person we’d like to become—and “most importantly, transcend that vision.”

“So many people have never had an opportunity to really talk about themselves in a safe, nonjudgmental space where their life’s story is front and center. This idea, though quite simple, is transformative.”

When many people think of seeking therapy, they do so quietly, and often with a lot of shame. I can’t believe I need this, you might wonder. Has it really come to this? you might say to yourself.

It takes courage and strength to seek therapy. As Hotchandani said, it is something that “should be celebrated and honored, because it is such an important act of self-care at the most fundamental level of health and wellness.”

“Making the phone call and showing up to your first appointment is 50 percent of the work and the hardest part of the work. Once you get started with a therapist that is right for you, you will thank yourself,” he said.

And maybe that’s the most unknown and surprising benefit of all.

To read more articles by MargaritaTartakovsky, M.S., CLICK HERE

6 Ways That Mindfulness Reduces Stress

Mon, 03 Jun 2019 11:41:52 GMT

Shifting into a conscious state of mind, focusing on the present moment, and increasing overall awareness is often referred to as mindfulness. Practicing mindfulness consistently has multiple benefits such as improved general health, pain relief, academic success, increased self-awareness, better attention span, increased sense of gratitude, and stress relief. Reducing stress is a common motivation to practice mindfulness, often through meditation, because it is truly effective at doing so. Stress is experienced by all of us, to some degree, and the good news is that there is a simple and holistic way to relieve it... through a daily practice mindfulness. Mindfulness can be practiced through meditation or simply through a more aware and conscious view of our experiences and feelings. There are many ways that mindfulness helps to reduce stress by making us feel calmer, allowing us to regulate our emotions, by reducing activity in the amygdala, and by teaching acceptance, awareness, and gratitude.

1. Developing a Calm Demeanor

It is not a surprise that practicing mindfulness makes us feel calmer; the question is how exactly? Mindfulness meditation reduces the production of a stress hormone called cortisol, resulting in relaxation. Most of us are continuously thinking about errands, social interactions, future plans, and responsibilities which can be anxiety-inducing and overwhelming. Thepresence of this ongoing, inner chatter hinders our ability to focus, be aware, and truly enjoy the present. Practicing mindfulness is a wonderful way to press pause, set everything aside, and re-connect with yourself. Setting aside even 5-10 minutes daily to breathe and meditate is incredibly beneficial for your physical, emotional, and mental well being. Ultimately, you feel calmer, more composed, and more focused.

2. Better Emotion Regulation

The ability to regulate one’s emotions is important because it can lead to mood improvement (ideal for those who experience many ups and downs) and long-term well being. Emotions directly affect our moods which is why it is important to develop another sense of awareness of ourselves through mindfulness. By practicing mindfulness, you can condition yourself to pay more attention to the different feelings and sensations that you experience on a daily basis. Overall, by being more aware of emotions, we are able to experience more compassion, empathy, and understanding while not allowing negative emotions to affect us as much. One incredible benefit that mindfulness meditation offers is resilience which is a buffer when dealing with emotional highs and lows. Set time aside, especially during moments of stress, and simply become aware of what you are feeling. Without trying to suppress anything, observe the effects of your emotions on your body and your mind with patience.

3. Acceptance

The practice of mindfulness has a beautiful way of teaching acceptance and essentially, how to be at peace with your surroundings without trying to alter them. Passing judgment is a common human tendency that is difficult to shake off however, mindfulness allows us to develop a neutral stance towards the feelings and thoughts that we experience. The ability to observe your thoughts passing by, one by one, without trying to alter or criticize anything can be achieved through mindfulness meditation. Accepting feelings of stress and allowing them to pass instead of fighting those feelings makes stress more bearable. The imperfections and difficult moments of life make the good moments even better which is why accepting adversity is so important in terms of combatting stress.

4. Less Activity in the Amygdala

To put simply, the amygdala refers to a set neurons in the brain which is responsible for the processing and regulation of emotions, memory, and survival instincts. This part of the brain is also stimulated when we experience stress and fear. Practicing mindfulness consistently can actually allow us to be more self-aware and concentrated while making better decisions to the decreased activity in the amygdala. Other benefits also include better problem solving skills while facilitating learning and of course, relieving overall feelings of tension and stress. Simply mindfulness habits such as becoming aware of how food tastes and eating slowly, breathing deeply, listening carefully, and focusing on how your body feels while working out can provide these benefits.

5. Increased Awareness

The concept of increasing your overall awareness has already been briefly mentioned but let’s dive deeper into this concept. Most of our actions tend to be automatic due to habit and routines such as eating, drinking, resting, walking, talking, etc. Basic human functions are often taken for granted and of course, this is normal. When we are exposed to something long enough to repeated stimuli, our response decreases just like how we notice the scent of a candle in a room but after a while, we do not notice it anymore. By increasing awareness through mindfulness, we are able to notice and uproot negative tendencies while choosing not to respond with stress or panic in difficult situations. With awareness comes appreciation of the wonderful things we experience daily along with a newfound sense of well-being. That being said, when mindfulness is implemented, awareness eliminates stress.

6. Increased Sense of Gratitude

It’s easy to overlook the beautiful scenery that we see every day and it’s easy to take things for granted. It’s also easy to forget the blessings that exist in our lives because we are used to them being there. Gratitude is an incredibly powerful feeling that can overpower stress. With a mindfulness practice, you become aware of absolutely everything, internally and externally. Then, you go on to accept everything that you are experiencing as part of your journey. After awareness and acceptance, comes gratitude for everything, physical and nonphysical, that surrounds you. It’s difficult to feel stressed and tense when the feeling of gratitude overwhelms you; although your adversity is valid and should not be suppressed, focusing on the good things and people in your life makes difficulties seem manageable and temporary.

Practicing mindfulness, either through meditation or other habits, on a daily basis can provide incredible benefits for your mind and body regarding stress relief. By accepting, becoming more aware, feeling grateful, and embracing a calm demeanor through mindfulness, stress can be reduced.

To read more articles from Stella Versteeg, Click Here

14 Benefits of Teletherapy for Clients

Tue, 29 Jan 2019 00:26:43 GMT

Online counseling is the new frontier. Reasons to consider taking the plunge.

In our digital revolution, innovation is ever rapidly changing our daily lives. Adapting, whether as digital immigrants or natives, is required to survive anymore. Why then, do we keep revisiting antiquated ways of doing things? As therapists we know that much has changed in the landscape of psychotherapy. What was once therapy sessions generously covered under insurance benefits during the Golden Age of Therapy 25 years ago (Grodzki, 2015), has been hacked away by modern HMO companies requiring endless streams of codes and paperwork. Further, wait times in rural and large cities for therapy services increase as coverage decreases. Online therapy options are the new frontier. One that many may resist, but that ultimately provide major benefits to clients and therapists alike.

Having recently moved to a fully virtual therapy practice using live video (e.g., like FaceTime but using HIPAA-compliant technology), the benefits have been immediate and in many ways unexpected. It is no surprise that telehealth is currently a 6 billion dollar industry with estimates that it will reach close to 20 billion dollars in 2025 (HCInnovation, 2018). While I initially dabbled with teletherapy more by accident than intention (starting with college students in-state living 2-3 hours away from my office), I quickly came to see it benefits for a much larger range of clients. Below, are listed some of the most notable benefits to date.

1. Low Barrier to Entry: One of the biggest challenges facing prospective therapy clients is that initial appointment. Statistics indicate the modal number of sessions attended by clients is: one. That’s right, patients will go to one session and never go back again. Theories abound—the experience was awful, there was not a fit with the therapist, or the most self-satisfied of them all- the therapist was so highly effective that they managed to “cure” their client in one majestic session (likely not the case). How does telehealth fit in? An easy way to describe it is this—all those things you hate about your dentist waiting room? They apply in therapy as well. Finding the office, sitting, anxiously counting down the time, waiting for your name to be called. With teletherapy, it’s almost always in the comfort of your own home. You can have your cozy blanket, your special mug, all the things that make you feel at ease. What better start to therapy and opening up than in your safe space?

2. Privacy: While this can certainly vary depending on geographical location and the diversity of clients seen by a therapist, teletherapy ensures maximal privacy every time. As one who specializes in teens and young adults, I have found more than once that my clients (even going to different schools and residing in different cities) manage to know one another. I have walked in (and out of my office) on more than one occasion witnessing awkward small talk between these clients who knew each other in kindergarten or who are mortal enemies. With social media anymore, everyone is connected. While I have often managed to help teens find the silver lining of running into acquaintances (we all have issues, therapy is normalized), teletherapy removes this concern altogether.

3. Efficiency: Time is perhaps our most precious resource. As such, commutes can be frustrating and stressful for clients already prone to anxiety. Unexpected traffic closures often lead clients to race in, anxious about being late or missing any part of their therapy time. In one scenario I had a patient get into a car accident on the way over to see me. Needless to say, our conversation that session wound up focusing on something entirely different than what we had intended. With enough on their brimming plates, the last thing clients need to worry about is one more place to be. And for that matter, one extra cost if parking tickets or accidents are involved.

4. Flexibility : Relatedly, teletherapy allows for maximal flexibility for overworked and overcommitted clients. Having worked with many high achieving populations who are at the verge of mental breakdowns, those who need services the most often have the least time. Being able to reschedule and integrate emergency sessions impacts the therapist and caseload at large minimally. Although of course high severity patients should rarely be seen in outpatient situations without extra staff support, for clients with severe anxiety that is otherwise well managed, the ability to schedule an emergency check-in can be invaluable.

5. Safety: Across much of the nation, severe winter weather can put a kink in plans. In Oregon where an inch of snow shuts down the city, snow days can wreak havoc on scheduling. Some clients are stranded on mountain tops, others have four-wheel drive and trek their way to an office that closed down hours ago. Such concerns are eliminated in teletherapy. Further, there is no expectation that clients leave their homes in dangerous weather, there are no late cancellation fees, or consideration of what school districts are opened or closed. With teletherapy, the show can go on, each time.

6. Illness: It is not uncommon for teens with heavy workloads and many pressures to repeatedly succumb to illnesses. I have had clients with severe flus and viruses (often actively contagious) come in which puts me and by extension my other patients at risk. Further, illness often can cause additional last minute cancellations while mood plummets. The ability for clients to continue working with their therapist, especially when ill, can be highly impactful. Teletherapy makes it safe for both clients and therapists.

7. Patient Timeliness Improved: When sessions begin at the click of a button, timeliness is certainly improved. Without the concern of a traffic jam, getting lost on their way to the office, or running low on gas, it is a no-brainer that timeliness is significantly improved when clients are always in reach of their devices.

8. Communications Improved : Like many therapists working independently, prior to moving to a full-time virtual practice, I rented a space in an executive office suite. While there were front desk staff servicing the floor, they also represented dozens of other entities from lawyers to accountants to real estate agents. With high turnover on their staff, messages were often missed, and information was not always clearly articulated (such as the time I was told a patient came in for me on a day I was not scheduled- there was no name, number, nothing leaving me guessing who on my caseload came in for an appointment!). Removing the middleman so to speak eases communication significantly and improves the overall therapeutic experience.

9. Streamlined Communication: One of the most integral components of my practice is my online billing, scheduling and charting program which also offers teletherapy directly via secure link. Clients can opt for a reminder text, email, or both and all the information regarding their appointment is at their fingertips. While this unfortunately sounds like advocacy for the takeover of robots, the truth is these programs simply don’t make errors but for exceedingly rare glitches. Having everything in one place is beautifully simple and fits in with the general ethos of teletherapy. In rare times when two patients have shown up for the same session, I have always felt terrible sending them home again when I know they rushed to get there. With teletherapy, when these rare errors occur, there is no harm, no foul.

10. A ccess to Facilities, Food, Drink, etc.: As a therapist to many teens who are often rushing over from school or other activities, I have more than once encountered a ravenous and therefore grouchy teen. I have often supplied my office with healthy snacks and drinks and watched teens polish off bag after bag of snacks while telling me about their day. While I don’t encourage eating for the full duration of therapy, a satiated client whose basic needs are met is certainly important. As such, one of the benefits of teletherapy is access to any of the needs that may come up for a client, down to a bathroom with no line (or worse, risk of running into the therapist in the next stall over!).

11. Access for Remote Patients: More times than I can count, I have done a double take when I have reviewed a new client’s file and seen their home address listed in a city about an hour away. In one case, it was a teen living with an elderly grandmother who would drive through wind and rain and on windy dangerous roads to get to my office. It was dangerous for them and frankly unnecessary. When we switched to teletherapy, the therapeutic relationship was maintained, the therapy continued effortlessly and there was no disruption for this family. If anything, our clinic likely saved some harm to the teen and the driving grandmother whose vision had been slowly deteriorating over time.

12. Access for College Students: The fact that college counseling centers are more and more swamped is hardly news to those who have worked in such settings. Further, not all colleges are in towns with access to private providers, nor do all college students even have cars. Enter the beauty of access to a wide network of providers without any transportation hassles. As previously discussed, my earliest work in teletherapy came out of necessity for college students who either could not be seen at the college counseling center or who did not feel comfortable walking into the center and being seen by friends.

13. Access for Disabled Populations: In many scenarios, those who are bedridden, have chronic illness or otherwise can be major beneficiaries of online treatment options. There are times when clients suffering from IBS, Crohn’s or other diseases may experience shame or embarrassment at their need for leaving to use facilities. In an online context, some of these concerns can be diminished significantly. Further, wheelchair accessibility can be a significant barrier with populations as well; I recall working with one patient and quickly learning we had to make sure to use a room with a door wide enough to let the chair pass, as well as extra room for the wheelchair to maneuver into position. While ideally, more locations will be ADA-accessible, the unfortunate reality is that in older locations, historic buildings, and so forth, making these changes can take time and in other cases be impossible.

14. Wait Times Reduced: Finally, perhaps obvious but well worth stating is the benefit of near immediate access. Having worked in large clinics, I have observed insurance teams taking weeks to confirm benefits, process paperwork, and possessing other bureaucratic hassles. For clients able to see private practitioners, access can be near immediate. To be frank, that is one of my favorite parts of solo practice—for too many years I witnessed those in severe need go weeks until they could get an appointment. With virtually all aspects of my practice being paperless and electronic, I can send paperwork to the patient via secure connection, have it filled out, and sent back to me within the day. Most often I can accommodate patients within a week, if not within 24 hours depending on how quickly we can get things going. For clients who are in need to talk to someone urgently, or perhaps finally mustered up the courage to see someone, often waiting weeks can lead to appointment cancellations or clients in dire situations.

While there is no doubt that much more needs to be done before clients and therapists fully embrace and explore online therapy options, the future certainly looks bright. With more and more individuals telecommuting, busier schedules, and the need for greater flexibility in our ever changing world, teletherapy opens up a whole new frontier.

To read more articles from Goali Saedi Bocci Ph.D. , Click Here

Rescuing Your Relationship from Stress

Tue, 28 Nov 2017 08:00:00 GMT

Emotional distance, a loss of intimacy, and the death of romance. That describes our marriage less than six months after my wife and I exchanged vows. We’d married with dreams of living happily ever after. Conflict on our honeymoon cast doubt that our dreams would come true, putting our relationship on the rocks. Then I started a new job that demanded up to 80 hours of my attention each week. I coped with the stress by shutting out my wife.

In the months before our wedding, the passion between us was thick. While we lived 90 minutes away from each other, we’d talk on the phone for hours, send each other love notes, and spend every weekend together. But emotional distance and romance are like oil and water. They don’t mix, and they create a slippery surface that can cause couples to slide into a world of disappointment and frustration. Married and living together, in the few hours a week we had together we became uncomfortable in each other’s space.

That’s a problem many couples face when one or both partners succumb to stress.

The relationship troubles begin when one partner shuts out the other from their inner world. It’s destructive to the relationship, but it’s seldom done intentionally. It’s a dysfunctional way of coping that expresses itself in various behaviors. A recent study in Britain revealed one in four couples sleep in separate beds due to the stress in their lives. Some couples keep their conversations on an intellectual level, and avoid talking about what’s in their hearts. Others use harsh words or silence to keep each other out.

When individuals and couples discover functional ways of coping with stress, they can restore emotional closeness, renew intimacy, and revive romance. My wife and I floundered for three years before I agreed to see a clinical psychologist who guided me toward better coping skills. If your stress is pushing you and your partner apart, you don’t need to wait any longer. Consider these actions as steps you can take toward transforming your relationship from disappointment and dread to one fueled by passion.
Identify Your Stressors

Stressors experienced outside the relationship by one or both partners can cause distress in the relationship. High levels of stress from outside sources often interfere with a couple’s ability to communicate effectively, connect emotionally, and manage conflict in their relationship.

The Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale is a helpful tool for identifying sources of stress. Work through the scale with your partner to identify stressors weighing on each of you. Chances are if one of you is stressed, you both are. Add up your individual scores and compare your levels of stress.

The scale provides a starting point for you and your partner to zero in on what’s pulling one or both of you down. As you identify your stressors and compare scores on the stress scale, keep in mind that people react to stress differently. The weights on the scale are based on averages. Your experience may be of greater or less intensity than the score on the scale. You and your partner may also differ in the severity of stress you each experience in response to the same event.
Speak from Your Heart

Once you each identify your stressors, start sharing with each other what you’ve been going through. Take turns answering the following questions:

    In what ways has stress been affecting your emotions?
    What are you doing that helps you cope with your stress?
    What ways are you coping with stress that are having a positive effect on your relationship?
    What ways are you coping with stress that are having a negative effect on your relationship?
    What actions would like to take to cope with and reduce stress in the future?

Listen intently to your partner’s responses. When your partner is done talking, reflect back in your own words what you heard them say about what they’ve been going through.
Strengthen Your Resilience

The ability to bounce back from loss, trauma, tragedy, and other stressors is called psychological resilience. We all possess it. Its strength varies from one person to the next. The stronger our resilience is, the better we cope with stress. If your resilience is weaker than you’d like, you can strengthen it.

Research has identified behaviors, thoughts, and actions that can build up resilience. But the path to strengthening resilience is a personal journey, and each person needs to choose an approach that fits with their values and lifestyle.

Here are some ideas that can help you and your partner choose your path to stronger resilience:

Get socially connected. Social isolation weakens resilience, while social connection strengthens it.

Begin by working on your connection with your partner. Practice by learning to identify each other’s bids for connection and responding by turning toward each other. Cultivate fondness and admiration. Establish what Dr. Gottman calls “rituals of connection.”

Find social groups you both can participate in that share your common interests and values, such as charities, clubs, or community organizations. If you and your partner are struggling with the same stressor, consider connecting with a support group with others who are dealing with similar issues.

Take care of yourself. Stress takes a psychological and physical toll on a person. Engage in activities individually and with your partner that can help restore balance and health to your mind and body.

Discovering and practicing your gifts, passions, and values can restore a sense of meaning and purpose. These are closely tied to resilience. Practicing gratitude is an effective tool for improving mental health. Exercise and good nutrition counteract the effects of stress on the body as well as the mind.

Set and pursue goals. As you and your partner discuss how you each want to cope with and reduce stress in the future and strengthen your resilience, you’ll identify actions to take. Set individual goals and agree on goals to pursue together to bring about the changes you want. Then work out a plan for each goal, and a method for tracking your progress.

Dr. Gottman also has tips and strategies for self-care and setting and achieving goals.
Update your Love Maps

A Love Map is what Dr. Gottman calls the part of the brain where we store important details about our partner’s life including their likes, dislikes, fears, and dreams. Dr. Gottman’s research shows that couples who keep accurate Love Maps of their partners have happier marriages and are better prepared to weather difficult life passages.

Stressful events can change your partner’s view of themselves and their world. Updating your Love Map is important during this time. Ask your partner about how their stressors have changed how they feel about their life, job, relationships, security, and future. Doing so can help cultivate emotional closeness and intimacy, and revive a dormant romance.

To read more articles by Jon Beaty, CLICK HERE

How to Stop Worrying with Mindfulness Meditation

Thu, 26 Feb 2015 16:20:19 GMT

Generally speaking, mindfulness meditation provides us with tools that guide us to its benefits—increased happiness, health, and peace. One of the most powerful tools of mindfulness meditation is learning to listen to and understand the inner workings of our own minds. You might even call this understanding of self through mindfulness an innerstanding.

Developing knowledge of one’s self is a great endeavor, but to make the pursuit more manageable, we can divide it into smaller tasks. A great place to start is to learn of and understand the specific moods and automatic process of our cognition. These processes, when left unobserved, seem to give our minds “minds of their own” and determine our emotional states without our conscious consent.

When we begin to understand the automatic mental processes that run in the background of our minds, we’ve accomplished the first step toward taking direct control of these processes and changing their outcomes.

Papancha is a special word for one such mental process that can overwhelm our awareness, often with unwanted negative thoughts, unless we become aware of it and keep it in check. Mindfulness, like with so many other inner workings, makes it possible to clear the papancha that blocks us from experiencing the present moment.
What Papancha Means

The word papancha, which comes from the Tibetan language, has no direct translation in English. One Tibetan scholar translates papancha as “an eruption of mental commentary that obscures the raw data of cognition.” Let’s explore that definition a bit more. Here are two everyday examples of papancha:

Example 1

Let’s say that it’s nearing the time of day when your spouse or significant other is usually on their way home from work. The minutes on the clock tick by one after another, and instead of arriving home at the usual time, you instead receive a text message from them.

The text message only says, “Something came up. Gonna be late.” Your significant other is rarely late coming home and only rarely texts you, usually preferring a more-personal phone call. A text message this brief is also well out of the ordinary.

Suddenly your mind, seemingly on its own, bursts forth with a flurry of worries, doubts, and fears. What could possibly be the cause of this break from routine? Did they get pulled over on the way home? Are they held up at work because of a problem? Are they getting fired? Or even worse, are they having an affair?

This is papancha: I imagine that most people reading this realize that it’s something we all experience on a regular basis.

The negative commentary has a tendency to escalate quickly and without any grounding in reality, or the actual sensory input that we are receiving. If the relationship in this example were a strained one or experiencing difficulties, the person’s papancha would likely lend itself even more easily to these negative cognitive leaps.

Of course, the significant other, in the vast majority of cases, eventually comes home, and it is revealed that the holdup was caused by something quite ordinary and benign, despite our papancha’s superb ability to catastrophize almost anything.

However, panpancha’s mental commentary isn’t always negative commentary. Here’s another example to illustrate that.

Example 2

Similar to the first example, you receive an unexpected text message, but this time from a close friend who has been struggling with a serious and chronic health issue. The text reads, “Call me. I have great news!”

You are tied up at the moment and won’t be able to call back for some time. Your papancha’s imagination runs wild. Are they feeling well today? Did their insurance coverage finally come through? Or even better, have they had a breakthrough in their condition? A cure!

Once you get your friend on the line, you feel a little silly when they reveal that their excitement was unrelated to the health issues that instantly dominated your cognition when you received their text.
The Problem with Papancha

Whether the mental commentary produced by papancha is positive or negative doesn’t matter. The end result is always a negative one in terms of your ability to live in the moment.

In both examples above, even the example of positive papancha, the person’s mind is disconnected from the realities of the present moment as soon as the papancha begins. The raw data of their experience is hidden under the veil of unchecked thoughts that are jumping to unfounded conclusions in the future.

For example, and referring to Example 1 above, what is the raw data of the experience there? It is only this: that the person received a text message from their significant other saying that something came up and that they’ll be late coming home from work. That’s it! And until more information comes in, a mindful mind would allow itself to stop there.

Just from that, can you see how being mindful of papancha and stopping it before it begins has the potential to ease a great deal of self-inflicted suffering? Even in the case of positive papancha commentary, we experience an unnecessary (and illusionary) sense of loss when we discover that reality doesn’t support our hopeful cognitive bounds. We can avoid all of these negative effects of papancha with the help of mindfulness meditation.
How to Clear Papancha with Mindfulness Meditation

The steps to clear papancha through mindfulness are quite simple, and you’ve already begun to accomplish the first step just by reading this post! Here are the steps:

Become aware of your papancha: Of course, awareness of papancha is the first step in your mindfulness work to clear it.

Put it on pause the next time it happens: Try to recognize it the next time it begins in your mind. It may be difficult at first, as papancha tends to have the greatest hold on us when our fears and other emotions are the highest.

Evaluate the mental commentary: Once you’ve put the papancha on hold, take a moment to analyze the commentary. Is it rational? Is it connected to the present? Is it helping you feel how you want to feel?

Revise the commentary: By answering the questions in step three, you will know how to change the conversation in your mind to your benefit. Referring again to Example 1 above, this revision step might result in acknowledging that you are simply worried about the break in routine and had begun to jump to conclusions. You are now accessing the raw data of your cognition.

Keep practicing: Just repeat these steps each time papancha begins to take hold. It will get easier and easier to clear with each effort.

Far more often than not, the fears and projections that we invent never actually happen, and essentially are a waste of our energy when we entertain them or allow them to entertain themselves.

Because of the ancient tradition of mindfulness meditation, we have a guide to avoid this kind of imaginary pain, and focus our thoughts and energies on more important (and real) things and events that can enrich our experience, rather than take away from it.

To read more articles from Charles Francis, Click Here